The Letters Of Fate
by FreedomInFountainPens
Summary: For almost 2 decades, Tris Prior and Tobias Eaton have been writing each other letters in the mail. After all those years, they have never met. When Tris gets offered a job as a Personal Assistant in Dauntless Police Department in Chicago, she takes the job, knowing she'd be in the same city as Tobias. What she doesn't realize - she's Tobias' new PA. Modern Day AU *ON HIATUS*
1. Chapter 1

**(Yes, I am starting a new story! Funnily enough, the idea for this story came from this weird ass dream I had the night before I wrote it. So, the point here is – my subconscious is weird, but can be surprisingly useful! I never would've thought of this without that dream. In the earlier letters, the spelling is wrong in places. That's because they were just young kids!**

 **I've had a pretty awful week, and just this Friday I was sent to isolation for the first time for using my phone to text my dad in a bathroom to say I needed lunch money. I cried almost all day, it was honestly one of the worst experiences I've had. I was among older boys who had been sent to isolation because they had sworn at a teacher, or flipped a table or something, and they kept snickering at me and giving me weird looks because I was doing what I was meant to be doing – reading. Thank goodness my reading book was Divergent. I spent the moments I wasn't crying thinking up this story and enjoying the canon one in front of me. I will continue Faction High, but I really want to try something original like this.**

 **My focus is on this story, rather than Faction High, but there is not much between them. Next upload will be this story, and the one after that will be Faction High.**

 **I am also British, but I know the majority of readers are American, so I made it so they start writing at 5 or 6? That's when you start kindergarten right? We start pre-school at 3 or 4, but I did my best! This chapter is Tris explaining the letters from when they were little kids until present day when she is in her early 20s. Hope you enjoy this story!)**

 _August 2001_

I was only 5 when I received the first letter. My parents were good friends with my Dad's boss, Marcus. When I was 5, my Mom gave me a letter that was addressed to me. Being 5, my only priorities were my brother Caleb, cookies with milk and my Nintendo console. They kind of still are my priorities, but when the first letter arrived, it was like it went straight to the top of my list.

When this letter arrived, I remember my Mom handing it to me and sitting next to me and Caleb on the couch to read it to me. She was laughing quite a bit, but I wasn't really paying attention to her. I was too busy focusing on how overjoyed I was that somebody had spent time writing a letter to me, just me. Not all of us, or me and Caleb, just me.

The writing was all squiggly, but I could read it well enough. My Mom told me it had come from Marcus and Evelyn's son, Tobias. Apparently, he was in kindergarten and started writing recently, and Evelyn thought it would be sweet if he wrote me a letter. I opened the envelope with care, cautious to not rip it. I was only 5, but I could read a lot of the words myself. I was starting kindergarten too in a few weeks.

 _Deer Beatrice,_

 _Hi. My name is Tobias. I can rite now! Do you like cookies?_

 _From Tobias_

That's all it said, and the spelling wasn't perfect, but I was enthralled. I immediately wanted to know what to do with the letter, but I slid it back in the envelope and took it to my room, sliding it in the space between my bed frame and mattress. I kept that space for very important things, things that are very special to me. The only other thing in there was a picture of me and Caleb as babies, but this definitely made the cut.

I raced back down the stairs to my mom, jumping up and down, squealing. She laughed loudly at this and sat me down at the kitchen table, showing me how to reply to the letter. I spent ages making sure all the letters were neat and legible. After a while, my Mom started making dinner, but I kept at my letter on my own, folding it neatly and sliding it into the envelope, then licking it closed and addressing it.

 _Dear Tobias,_

 _I love cookies! Thank you for writing to me._

 _From Beatrice :)_

I even added a smiley face to show my gratitude. I handed it to my mom and she beamed at me. I still don't know exactly what she was smiling so widely for. Maybe because I made a friend, or maybe because I had written a letter with such enthusiasm. She told me she would mail it to Tobias, but I wasn't happy with that. I wanted to see it got there without interruption. She smiled at me once again and told me we could walk to their house and put it in their mail box after dinner. I was very impatient for the next hour. I wolfed down my dinner, to which my Mom and Caleb just laughed. My Dad looked very confused at first, but Caleb explained everything, and my Dad just gave my mom a look I didn't recognise at the time.

I was finished a lot sooner than everyone else, so I just sat their impatiently until my mom finished. My mind started to wander, wondering what Tobias looked like, what their house looked like, what he would think of my letter etc.

After what felt like an eternity, my Mom finally steps up with the letter and leads me to the door. I clutched my letter in my hand like it was my lifeline, my other holding my Mom's. We walked along the identical houses for a little while, until my mom let go of my hand and pointed to one of the houses with a smile. I beamed and ran forward, opening the mailbox with the wooden handle and popping my letter in. While sliding the shutter down, my eyes drifted up to a boy a little older than me looking out of a window on the upper floor. He had dark hair, and was wearing a grey hoodie, when we made eye contact, he smiled widely. I waved a little with my hand and smiled back, before turning to my mom with a smile.

She took my hand once more and we walked off home, content my letter had been delivered.

 _September 2001_

Tobias and I wrote a total of 5 letters each for the next month. Each letter had me reading intently, learning more about him, and getting closer to my best friend. We still hadn't met yet, and that was because of one reason - our parents had fallen out. Or at least our fathers. From what I knew, our mothers still keep in touch to this day, but we had moved away at the end of August to Orlando, miles away from Chicago.

Yet, we still kept writing. The subjects of the letters were completely random, going from cookies and pencils to trainers and our school friends. My Dad clearly didn't want me writing to him, but Mom firmly told him it was perfectly fine, and I would very anyways if he tried to stop me. So, the letters continued.

 _January 2003_

We had never stopped writing for 2 years, and yet we never ran out of things to talk about. Tobias was 8 and I was 6 at this point, but we still remained best friends. I even told him that once, saying he was the best friend I had. He had his own friends now, who I learned a bit about, and I had Christina and Will, but we still never could forget each other. Everyday I'd check the mail-box on my way home from 1st and 2nd grade to see if he had written me a letter, and most days he had. it became a routine, me checking the mail box, reading his letter 2 or 3 times, then writing a reply, sending it, and putting the letter under my mattress. It was a routine I cherished in every way possible.

 _September 2007_

Our letters had gotten much longer and more complex. Tobias was about to start high school, as was Caleb, and it worried me greatly. I was absolutely terrified that Tobias and Caleb would forget about me, and cried about it for days, until Tobias wrote me a touching letter.

 _Dear Beatrice,_

 _Don't you think for a minute that I will forget about you. I can't go 5 minutes without thinking about you and our letters, and although I'll make new friends and meet new people, you will always be my best friend. Our letters will only get longer, I promise. Caleb won't forget you either, but to be honest with you, you'll still see him every day. I'm still not over the fact he called our letters lame. LAME! I know for fact you just laughed at that. I wish I had heard you laugh in real life, but those smartphone thingys are so damn expensive. I'm sending a picture of myself with this letter, so you know what I look like now. You better send one back because I'm DYING to know what you look like._

 _From Tobias_

I cried while reading the entire thing. It completely set my mind at ease. I still have no idea how he does that, how he can calm me with some simple words. He did send a picture, of him and his close friend Zeke outside the paintball place he always talks about. He looks happy in the picture, smiling widely, a paintball gun strapped across his front. His eyes are dark blue. I've never seen eyes like that before, and I haven't seen a single dark blue eyed-person to this day. His jawbone and cheekbone are sharp, but his lightly tan skin stretches over them expertly. I can even see faint freckles on his nose. I decided not to put that letter in my mattress, no, I decided to frame it. I used an empty white photo frame my Mom had left in my room for on my bedside table and slid the photo into it. It never moved for 10 years.

 _October 2007_

After I sent Tobias a picture of myself, he was quick to reply.

 _{Dear Tris,_

 _You're absolutely beautiful. I mean it, you are stunning. Shame we can't see each other in real life, I really wanna go see The Simpsons Movie with you. We both love that show, and the one time they make a movie we're miles away from each other. Please go and see it so we can talk about it later! I'm absolutely exhausted with Zeke at the moment. This random girl Myra is like the only thing he talks about. All day long 24/7 it's just Myra this and Myra that. I'm not jealous or angry or anything, I just wish he'd talk about something else. Especially since he keeps asking me for advice and when I give him sound, solid advice to just man up and ask her out, he tells me I'm being stupid. Sometimes he can be really dumb. Was Christina like this before she dated Will? And our friend Shauna won't shut up about how much she hates Myra. She's as bad as Zeke is! Our conversations are just like:_

 _Zeke: Myra is so gorgeous-_

 _Shauna: Are you kidding me? She's so damn fake! Have you seen how much make-up she wears?! God, Zeke, are you BLIND?!_

 _Zeke: Shauna! Why do you hate her so much?!_

 _Me: *Leaves the table*_

 _You know what I'm talking about, right?_

 _-Tobias}_

I felt honoured that he would tell me these kind of things, like what his friends are going through and his honest feelings about them.

 _Dear Tobias,_

 _Christina and Will were just like that! They can't see sense for all their emotions, and I can see why Shauna hates Myra so much. If I were in your school, I'd probably hate her too, I just can't stand people like that. She'd probably just see Zeke as another boy to play with, just another thing to snog, which he doesn't deserve. If they do go out, and you think she is just playing with him, tell him that. He probably won't listen to you, but at least you'll have tried. Try telling Uriah or their mom, you know, get backup with it. And yes, I will 100% go and see the Simpsons Movie, and probably give you a whole rant about it. I was cry laughing at your last letter, I can totally imagine that happening! I hope there isn't that much drama when I start high school, but with Christina, Will, Al and Marlene? It's basically guaranteed. Love ya,_

 _-Beatrice_

 _May 2009_

My first year of high school was...interesting. My emotions went from hysterical laughter to hysterical sobs. My best friends, Al, Will, Christina and Marlene were by my side the entire time, mostly so we wouldn't be alone in corridors with the older kids. We also had a... talk. A class full of awkward giggles, blushes, and cringes. I was completely out of my comfort zone, and though nothing happened to me specifically, I was still feeling mortified. I knew the moment I got home I would have to write to Tobias, but for the first time in 8 years, I didn't know what to say. _Would he think I'm weird? What would he say? What if he finds this just as embarrassing as I do and doesn't want to talk about it?_

I shook the thoughts away and focused on writing the letter, telling him everything on my mind. I'd been doing that for a while, and Tobias was always writing back detailed, kind advice, which almost always resolved everything.

 _Dear Tobias,_

 _I'm completely mortified. We had this "talk" in school today and I just want to crawl into a hole and die. I just thought babies happened when you kissed a lot, not THAT going there…and it's just really scary. I probably sound ridiculous and awkward, but you're the only person who I can really tell about this. You had this talk when you were my age right? I'm just a bit shocked, I have no idea what do about this, or what I should think or if I should get a boyfriend? Will and Christina are dating, and although they blushed and giggled a lot, they didn't seem as bothered as I did! Am I normal? I'm really scared Tobias. Write back!_

 _Love ya,_

 _-Beatrice_

I emptied my gut into that letter, and the moment I did I felt exposed and wanted to crumple it up and set it on fire, so nobody would know how scared I was about the idea of sex. How much it daunted me. Now I just had to post it and wait for Tobias' answer.

 _June 2009_

His reply to that embarrassing plea for help came back in 3 days, which is fast for our standards seeing as we live so far apart. I read it with shaky hands, constantly turning my head around to make sure nobody was watching me or reading the letter from over my shoulder.

 _Dear Beatrice,_

 _You have nothing to be scared about, and yeah, I got the same talk a few years ago. It's pretty embarrassing, yeah, but it's completely natural and you have nothing to worry about. And you don't need a boyfriend unless you want one. It isn't a social requirement. If you like somebody like that, and they like you back, then just see what happens. And sex can be scary, so don't think you aren't normal. You know you can talk to me whenever you want Tris, I won't judge you. We're surviving high school together, just hundreds of miles apart, right?_

 _-Tobias_

Just another example of how he's always been there for me. Those specific letters I made sure to keep tabs on, making sure nobody ever found them. Aside from my family, nobody really knew about the letters. My close friends knew I had a best friend who I had never met, but they didn't know much about Tobias. I didn't want to brag, it isn't like he was all mine. He was my best friend, yes, but not my property or bragging rights. He was just another part of my life, no matter how much he mattered to me.

 _November 2010_

 _Dear Tobias,_

 _Do you remember when you told me that if I liked somebody as more than a friend, I should tell them? Well, I really like this boy in my class, Peter. Please don't tell anybody, I'm really nervous about it. He's like, a rebel, but in a hot way. Like, he has tattoos, a leather jacket…He's mean to me quite often, but my Mom says that's his way of saying he likes me. I'm going to tell him this Friday. I really, really like him Tobias, like, I've never liked somebody this way this much. If he says yes, then I'll have no idea what to do, and if he says no, then I'll be heartbroken. I'm really chancing this, but Christina says I should just go for it. I had to tell you first before I asked him though, I just had to. Wish me luck! Love ya,_

 _-Tris_

Everybody called me Tris now. It was more of a name than a nickname, though Caleb still called me Beatrice. I was just Tris now to everybody else, and it was like I was becoming myself. Of course, it was Tobias' idea, telling me Beatrice sounded too long for me. I entirely agreed, but I didn't want to hurt my parents' feelings by rejecting the name they gave me. I went with Tris, but my Dad and Caleb still had a tough time remembering it. I was growing more and more nervous every day that went by this week, my mind stewing over Peter Hayes. Tobias' weariness in his letter was expected. I know he struggles with trusting people, but he wasn't possessive over me.

 _Dear Tris,_

 _I was NOT expecting that. He sounds kinda rough, but if you like him, go for it, but don't become dense. If you end up dating, make sure the relationship is healthy and he doesn't make you uncomfortable or upset. A lot of guys are doing that to girls in my year, and I presume yours too. Trying to make them lose their virginities and shit, and most of them just do it, not wanting to "disappoint" or whatever. It's always your choice Tris. If he says no, just be cool and say "OK, no hard feelings." Don't get upset over it, just take it in your stride. He might turn out to be a complete asshole, but I trust your judgement. Good luck Tris._

 _-Tobias_

I was thankful for his advice. It just made me feel like there was another person behind me, another person who actually cared. I _did_ ask Peter out that Friday. To my surprise, he actually said yes. I suppose I was just expecting the worst. I told Tobias that. He was happy for me, but I think deep down, he was scared I would stop writing. I couldn't.

 _December 2014_

Peter and I dated for 4 years after that. I wasted the ages 14-18 with that asshole. He was just like Tobias said, rough as the roads. He never bought me flowers, or held the door open for me, or bought me popcorn at the movies or anything. I stuck with it all that time, because I just thought we were a normal couple with flaws. What I didn't see until I was about 16, was that we were not like Will and Christina. They respected each other, cared about each other, and looked genuinely happy together. Peter always looked bored whenever he was with me. Like he was just waiting for me to say something, so he could run up to the next girl with big boobs and ombre hair.

I wrote about 15 letters to Tobias while in tears about Peter. One in particular stood out in my mind. I'd never minded clubbing and parties, I actually kind of liked them, but this one time was the stuff of nightmares. I'd gone with Peter, Will and Christina about a month after my 18th birthday. At about 12, Christina was getting pretty drunk, so Will took her home. I hadn't had anything to drink that night, so I was totally aware of everything going on. Peter, however, was not drunk, but he was tipsy and was definitely on the edge of being drunk.

I told him that I would drive, which I did, but as soon as we pulled up at his place, so I could get the bus home, he pulled me into the backseat. He'd always been strong and muscular, so he easily overpowered me. I tried pushing him off me, but he was insistent. He kept kissing me sloppily, trying to pull my dress off my shoulders . I knew exactly what he was doing. He'd been angry about it for the best part of 2 years, constantly pressuring me to have sex with him, but I never had because I promised myself I wouldn't until I was 21. I did the first thing that came to mind, slapped him in the face and kneed him in the balls. He groaned in pain and rolled off me, so I jumped out the car and ran, tugging my heels off my feet and running barefoot to the bus stop. After 10 minutes in the freezing air, the bus finally pulled up. The bald bus driver looked at me sympathetically as the tears started streaming down my face, and he let me ride free. I'm still thankful he did. I left my purse in Will's car when I went to have Christina do my eyeliner.

The next morning, I wrote to Tobias. I was asking him what to do, yes, but I already knew what I was going to do.

 _Dear Tobias,_

 _I'm breaking up with Peter. I've just had enough of him ignoring me and not paying attention to me, and last night he tried to drunkenly force me into sex. It was an absolute nightmare, Will had to take Christina home because she was getting a bit drunk, and I was left alone with Peter. I left my phone in my purse, which I left in Will's car. I had to run down the street barefoot too because I couldn't run in my heels, and Peter was drunkenly following me down the street. The bus driver let me ride free, thank God. You'll be pleased to know I did knee him in the crotch, so it wasn't ALL bad. As soon as I send this letter I'm texting him to say it's over. You've been trying to get me to see sense for years and I didn't listen, I'm so sorry Tobias. It's times like this I wish you were nearby, but I don't care, as long as you can talk to me. I'm sending another picture of me with this letter. We haven't sent new pictures in almost 3 years! Send one back! Love ya,_

 _Peter-free Tris_

I took a selfie with my iPhone 5, before sending it to my Dad's printer. I cut it out and slid it into the white envelope, before posting it. When I got back, I text Peter.

 _Tris: What you did last night was the last straw. I'm done with whatever this is. Don't talk to me ever again, you disgusting asshole._

 _Peter: You're so pathetic! I was bored of you the day you asked me out, you filthy slut._

I blocked his number after that. I was hurt a lot, and it took me a few weeks to get over it, but I was mostly over him before we broke up anyways. It was on my mind, it just took that night to light the fuse. I had actually been attracted to somebody else since I was 16, despite how much I told myself I wasn't, and I couldn't be…Tobias.

Ever since he sent me a letter explaining his parents divorce, I wanted to find him and hug him and… kiss him. I don't know where the thought came from, but the moment I had it, I couldn't stop thinking about what it would be like to kiss that full lower lip and spare upper one. And I decided I liked it. Maybe more than I should've. Ever since then, I've just been feeling like Peter is just a friend. Nothing more. That Tobias is who I should've been with for 4 years. But he wasn't, it hurt like hell knowing I'd probably never meet him. That he would remain miles away from me, no matter how much I dreamed, daydreamed and prayed he would just show up and kiss me, love me, hold hands with me…but back then, I thought I would never go to Chicago in my life. I'd always thought he was handsome, much more than Peter, but when I looked at his picture again at 16, it finally clicked that I'd fallen in love with him. Him and his kind, wise words, how much he genuinely cared and always supported me. I never told a soul. I couldn't, because if I did, it would be blatantly acknowledging the fact, which I didn't want to do. Unlike when I was asking out Peter, I couldn't take the risk. I couldn't risk losing my best friend for an unlikely shot at a long-distance relationship.

So, I kept it to myself.

Caleb actually went to Peter's house the day after I dumped him, after I told my family what happened. My Dad almost went too, but he had enough sense to control his anger. When Caleb finally came home, he looked quite pleased with himself. Turns out he'd giving Peter a punch to the nose and left. I'll always be proud of him for that.

 _August 2018_

A few weeks ago, I'd been offered a high paying job as a PA, to one of the main managers of the Digital Security Department of Dauntless Police. I wouldn't have taken the job, but I've always wanted a job like that, but as the manager, not the PA.

Dauntless is the name given for the Police Department in Chicago. The manager of the Digital Security Department and his team are responsible for murders and missing person cases and using CCTV to solve them. The kind of work I'd be around was tempting, as was the pay, but I knew I couldn't leave my family behind. That was until the penny finally dropped and I realised if I took the job, I'd be in the same city as Christina, Will and Tobias. As soon as the thought went through my head, I marched into the kitchen and announced to my parents I'd be taking the job. They were proud of me, very proud, but I think they were hoping I wouldn't take it. It felt awful moving so far away from them, but I had to. I'd be in the same city as Tobias.

 _September 14_ _th_ _, 2018_

Even though we both got phones years ago, we're yet to send more than a few texts. The call costs would be massive if we called too, because I know once we got started talking to each other, we'd never shut up. The call would last hours. I still rang him on his birthday, and on Christmas, but not much more on phones.

So, we kept writing letters. It cost me an extra $30 to bring a case filled with every single letter he'd written me onto the plane, but it was well worth it. I've already brought 2 massive ones that I've checked in, as well as my carry-on handbag, which was stuffed with letters anyways. I just needed them with me. The plane has just landed in Chicago, the city I was born in. The 3 hours I spent on the plane feel like mere minutes now. As soon as I'd collected my 2 massive cases on a trolley, as well as my carry-on case and handbag, I started pushing the heavy load towards the taxi I was supposed to take to my new apartment. The driver got out to help me with my cases and handed me my dolly trolley case and hand bag for the backseat. While he was closing the trunk, I decided to text Tobias.

 _Tris: Took the job! Guess where I've just landed in?_

 _Tobias: I knew you would take it! California? You've always wanted to go there._

 _Tris: Nope. I couldn't move that far away from home. It does begin with a C though._

 _Tobias: Colorado? Canada?_

 _Tris: That's even further away from home silly! No, I'm just pulling away from Chicago airport as we speak._

It took him a solid 5 minutes to respond as I made small talk with the driver. I was expecting a massive paragraph of text, but I got only a few words.

 _Tobias: Are you serious?_

 _Tris: No! WE'RE IN THE SAME CITY!_

 _Tobias: Where are you driving to? I'm meeting you right now._

 _Tris: Tobias, you're so sweet, but it's almost 11 at night. I'm really tired, and I have work tomorrow. I promise as soon as I finish work at 7 we'll meet up! I'm so excited to meet you in person. After almost 20 years…_

 _Tobias: I know. It's freakin' insane. See you tomorrow…holy crap…_

 _Tris: C u tomorrow! I'll text you after work tomorrow where to meet me, okay?_

 _Tobias: Yeah…I can't wait to see you Tris. I love you._

I didn't expect that at all. "I love you" is not something you toss around lightly, especially Tobias of all people.

 _Tris: What?_

 _Tobias: I love you Tris. You're my best friend, and I love you. It's going to be so surreal meeting you._

 _Tris: I love you too Tobias. See you tomorrow!_

 _Tobias: See you tomorrow._

With that I close off my iPhone 6 and get out of the taxi, the driver helping me with my massive cases. I load them into the elevator of the apartment building, it looks so nice in the lobby. My apartment is on the 6th floor, second from the top, so it takes a minute to get all the way up to my apartment.

When I open my apartment with my key-card, I'm blown away. It's exactly how I wanted it. The floors are carpeted white, like I ordered, my beige sofa is here as well. Everything else is right where I wanted it. I knew Christina would unpack everything for me. She already lives in Chicago. She started working in the same Police place I'm starting at tomorrow about 7 months ago, and she loves it. Obviously, as soon as she said she was moving, Will started boxing his things. They really can't leave each other, and I find it totally adorable. They live a few blocks down, in a much bigger apartment than this, but I don't mind, I like the size. Everything is just how I envisioned it. I made sure to use whites and neutral shades to make the place feel bigger, but still homely and comforting. I set my 2 massive cases down on the hall floor outside the living room, making a mental note to wake up a bit earlier to unpack some of it.

I unzip my bag and dolly trolley filled with letters and stuff them into my bedside cabinet, setting my most recent picture of Tobias, as well as pictures of me and Caleb as babies, my parents wedding photo, and Christina, Will and I on both graduation day and the first day of freshman year. I'm so pleased with the display I take a picture of it. I'm in the same city as my best friends, the best friend I have never met, and I have a decent job. Not bad for 22.

My mind wanders back to that place it has been going for almost 6 years. It wanders back to the daydreams of meeting Tobias, kissing him, dating him, everything…I highly doubt it'll ever happen, but we are meeting for the first time tomorrow. The thought is both exciting and daunting. It bubbles in my stomach until I fall asleep on the clean, white sheets, the picture of Tobias clutched to my chest from staring at it.

 _September 15_ _th_ _, 2018_

My alarm clock frightens me, as the moment I open my eyes I wonder where on earth I am, before a burst of excitement hits me. I'm starting a new job today. I'm meeting Tobias today. I somehow remembered to wake up earlier to unpack a bit this morning, but I don't have long. Work starts at 7, and it takes me 20 minutes on the bus to get there. It's already 6.

I make my bed and open my curtains to a beautiful city skyline. I beam at the skyscrapers and the Ferris wheel in the distance, the sun just shining over them. I turn around and drag one of my massive cases into my room, unzipping it all the way and starting to unpack and hang it all up in my built-in wall closet. I start with all my jeans, my black pencil skirts, various tops, and just finish getting all my white work blouses into the far-right side when my clock beeps, reminding me it's now 6:20.

I suddenly realise I completely miscalculated how long it would take me to get ready. I spend the next 20 minutes running around my apartment like a headless chicken, quickly buttoning up my white blouse, tugging up my black pencil skirt, and sliding on my black flats. I put on some simple make-up, after all, I'm going for professional and hard-working, not slutty. Just a bit of foundation, some mascara and very light brown eyeshadow. I tie the top half of my hair in a half-ponytail and let the rest flow down my back. I grab my phone, purse and keys, dropping them carelessly into my small black one-shoulder strap bag, before locking the door behind me and rushing to the train station.

Turns out Chicago is a much busier city than I anticipated. With my height and slender frame, it isn't hard for me to be jostled around a bit by the crowd, but somehow I do make it onto the train. I don't manage to get a seat, but it feels like seconds until I'm stepping onto the train platform just a block away from the DPD. I take a deep breath to settle the anxiety building up in my chest, before pressing on down the chilly morning streets. When I arrive, I'm directed by the receptionist to the Digital Security sector of the building, down a corridor to the left. When I arrive, I'm greeted by a dark-haired man with a maroon tie.

"Miss Prior! Pleasure to meet you. I'm George Wu, head of Digital Security here. You're just on time!" he says quickly, clearly in a rush, but still polite and friendly.

"It's nice to meet you sir. Who am I the PA of?" I ask with a small smile.

"Yes, one of the managers of this department. He deals with a lot of the computer-based things, and missing person cases. Fourth door on your right." He says quickly, before shaking my hand hastily and speed walking off. I stand there for a moment, a bit flustered, before walking down the dark carpeted hallway and counting the doors on my right. I check my pocket watch, and see I am actually not on time. I'm 5 minutes late. I gasp lightly at my tardiness, before hurrying into the fourth door. I do knock first, but I don't read the name plate on the door.

"Come in!" a deep voice sounds from inside the room. I twist the handle on the door and open it, closing it quietly behind me. The room is quite big, with a dark wood desk at one end, and a few chairs in front of it. There are a few bookshelves on either side of the room, but on the right of the main desk is a smaller one, where I must sit. There's a large corkboard on one wall, with multiple things tacked up. The man behind the main desk is staring intently at his screen, clicking away. He has dark, slightly curly hair, and is quite tall from what I can see. He wears a black blazer with a maroon tie, typical Dauntless Police Uniform. I make a mental note to wear a maroon bow or tie tomorrow.

He stands when he sees me standing there and crosses the room to shake my hand. His grip is firm but soft, and his skin is calloused. It sends heat through my hand and tingles down my spine. And that's when I notice. The deep blue eyes. The lightly tanned skin. The few nose freckles.

 _It's Tobias._


	2. Chapter 2

**(A/N: I'm sorry this took so long. As you can tell, I have put a lot of effort into getting frequent updates for Faction High. This is my more professional story. It will have a minimum of 5,000 words a chapter, has a more original concept, and hopefully, the characters are more in character. I find that particularly hard, I feel like Four in particular is always OOC in my stories. I also started Insurgent last week, which is already turning out to be spectacular.**

 **Unfortunately, I also went to my local bookstore today. I bought Four - A Divergent Collection, which, as a shorter book, I have read a bit of. That is amazing too. My problem is that I also bought...Allegiant. I have already SOBBED. Mostly because I wish I hadn't bought it. If I read it, I will not be able to finish it because then I will have to say that Divergent is over. I don't want it to ever be over, so I do not intend to read it until I am emotionally ready. Aka never)**

We both stand there frozen for what feels like an eternity. Our hands are still loosely connected in a handshake, and Tobias' mouth is hanging open quite a bit. I think mine is too, but I'm too focused on seeing those deep blue eyes for the very first time in person. They're even deeper than I imagined. I swallow thickly, completely lost for words. He must be too, because his mouth keeps opening as if he's going to say something, but then closing again. The silence isn't uncomfortable, just stunned. It's a good kind of silence, but I have to break it.

"T-Tobias?" I stutter in complete disbelief, even though I already know for definite it's him.

"Tris?" he asks, a stunned grin working its way onto his lips.

"Yeah...it's me." I say, before taking a quick step forward and throwing my arms around his shoulders tightly. He is much taller than I expected, but he wraps his arms around my back, holding me in the air. I actually feel tears filling my eyes. He doesn't let go, and neither do I. We don't want to.

"It's you...it's really you. You're right here..." he breathes.

"I can't believe it..." I laugh weakly. We stay like that for a few moments more, just savoring the feeling, but eventually he lowers me down and I unwrap my arms from his shoulder blades. Somehow, the tears in my eyes started dripping down my face, probably taking mascara with them. Tobias immediately steps forward and brushes them away with his thumb, but they keep coming.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't think I'd ever m-meet you, and y-you're right in front of me. It-it's all so surreal..." I stutter. He keeps wiping the tears away, sending warmth across my cheeks. I stop crying, but my breathing is still shaky and uneven.

"We should probably do work now...but I really don't want to." he says with a chuckle. It's a warm sound, it vibrates. It gives me chills. I suddenly realize I actually have a job to do, and I should really get around to doing it. We slowly walk to the desks, but we don't break the eye contact. I didn't think it would feel like this. I thought it would be like closure, like the end of almost 2 decades of longing for a person, but it isn't. It's like a supernova, everything changing irreversibly. I thought that my feelings of romantic attraction towards him would vanish, but they only seem to have grown stronger, judging on my heart beating at a million miles an hour.

When we get to the desks, he slowly sits down in his, and I do the same. It's a strange silence, like we don't know what to do with ourselves. I log onto the computer, knowing it is still the first day of a new job and I have to make the best impression possible. I open my file, which is connected with Tobias'. It is a complete mess when I open it. He always told me his desk is perfectly organised, but inside his computer is a bomb site. I guess he wasn't lying, because his desk is OCD worthy and this file looks like years worth of clutter.

I turn to him with a quizzical look, my eyebrows raised and knitted. He smiles widely at me, but I just laugh and scoff with fake anger.

"I take it my job is to organise...this?" I ask, with a light chuckle. Gesturing to the mess that is that file. It isn't even multiple messy files, just one massive one filled with what must be hundreds of documents. His hand goes to the back of his neck, running through is short, dark brown hair. His mannerisms are exactly as I imagined them.

"Yeah...you have 2 weeks to do it though, so don't sweat it. Sorry about that by the way, I just kept forgetting to organise it until your job opened up..." he says slowly, as if apologizing for something that isn't his fault.

"It's fine, I do like a challenge. I'm so excited to see our old High School friends again, it feels like forever..." I say, combing my hair to neaten it with my nails.

"Yeah, but do you mind if we meet them tomorrow?" he asks, and I understand what he means without him even saying it. _We need that time for each other._

I smile with my lips, and he beams again. I laugh once more, it's so strange. I'm so cheerful and optimistic today.

"Why do you keep smiling at me like that?" I ask through a giggle at the giddy expression he has, that I am sure he has too.

"Probably the fact my best friend has just appeared before me." he says sweetly, and suddenly that void opens back up, the void of feeling that I get when I imagine a relationship with him as more than friends. It is a different feeling than with Peter, or any other crush I've had over the years. It's a much deeper, more loving feeling. I turn my head before he can see the blush in my cheeks, and start creating sub-folders for the mess he's created.

We sit there typing and clicking away at our computers until 1 in the afternoon, but we must have spent a good portion of that time turning around and smiling at each other, just looking. The more time that passes, the more I realize that this is actually real. That the one person who I have always loved is right next to me. I know the moment he stands up to take me to lunch around the corner that I know I can never let him go, that no matter what happens I have to stick with him for the rest of my life.

He leads me down the street, and I chuckle, surprised at where he's lead me. I was expecting a fancy sandwich place or a deli, but Tobias has brought me to a Subway. He must have remembered the time I told him I loved subway years ago. He really was listening to every little go in, and before I even have a chance to speak, he orders something he must know I like. He orders his own as well, and we carry the sandwiches over to a table for 2 in the corner. I can't help but smile sweetly at him when we sit down. We both start eating, because we know there is too much to say. He breaks the comfortable silence this time.

"You're beautiful." he blurts out suddenly, and then my eye brows raise in surprise. He mustn't have realized what he said, because he is now running his hand through his hair nervously. "I'm sorry, that was really blunt. I knew you were stunning, but you're _beautiful_ in person." He explains, and in response my brain decides the best idea is to reach across the table and take his hand in mine. _TRIS! What the hell are you doing?! He doesn't like you like that! Stop it, he'll hate you!_

"Thank you Tobias...you look great too..." I murmur, so quietly he might not have heard me. I wasn't lying. He looks great. His hair is the same short length it was in the last picture he sent me, with slight curls at the front. His eyes are the same mesmerizing dark blue, and his skin is still tanned. I blush and look down when I say it, because I'm still scared that when he sees me in person, he won't like me. I continue, "I don't know what to say. You know everything about me, but I feel like I have so much to tell you, so much I didn't tell you in letters." I explain, my eyes flitting up to his insistent ones every so often. I can barely look away.

"I have secrets too, Tris. Not many, but I do." he admits, and I feel the knot in my stomach unloosen. Why did I ever think he would be angry at my keeping secrets? Admittedly, I don't think he understands what I mean by secrets. I mean the continually growing mass of affection and feelings for him. But I can't tell him that, because he could never feel the same.


	3. Chapter 3

**(A/N: I'd like to say a massive thank you to every single reviewer. Hell, just anybody who even looks at this story. Knowing something I wrote is being read and enjoyed by people makes me feel honored. So thank you. About this story, PLEASE READ THIS:**

 **1.) Tobias did not endure physical abuse from Marcus. Just verbal, which is just as bad. Don't hate me for this, I think it would be for the best.**

 **2.) He and Tris were a little bit awkward last chapter. That is because they were in shock. This chapter will be much more natural between them.**

* * *

 **Tobias' POV**

I can't believe what I'm seeing. It can't be true, it can't be real that the assistant that was starting today was Tris Prior. It can't be real that the girl I have loved, and loved, and loved, for almost 20 years just walked through the door of my office. It's not real, it's another dream, you idiot! Wake up, Tobias! But she is real, because I can feel her warm, soft hand in mine, and see how golden her hair is.

She's beautiful.

I knew she was pretty. Hell, when I was 15 I looked over at the picture of her she had sent me, and thought s _he's hot._ But when she walks through the door now, she is beautiful. Her hand is cool and soft when I shake it, and her eyes are so much more detailed than they were in the pictures. When you first see them, they are a steely blue, but on closer inspection, they appear more grey, but when I blink, they are blue again.

She seems as shocked as I am, because her jaw is hanging open, and a blush and a smile works its way onto her face. I can't think of what to say, I think of what I imagined I would say when I finally meet her, but I just can't. My mouth is opening and closing like a fish, and I imagine my eyes are wide, wide like hers. She finally lets go of my hand and jumps into my arms. The movement shocks me for a moment, but then I realize that this is Tris, the same Tris that I have loved for years. So I hold her in the air, due to her being so much shorter than me. Her arms are wrapped tightly around my back, and her hair is falling on us in perfect waves. I hold her up and just hold her there, thanking everything that she's here with me.

It's then that I remember how I feel about her.

 _Flashback:_

 _Zeke sits across from me at a table in our school's bustling cafeteria. Shauna sits right next to him, and I can tell they're holding hands under the table. I'm glad Zeke finally saw sense, and realized how much they liked each other. He's currently grilling me about who I want to take to Winter Formal._

 _"What about Nicole? She's pretty hot-" he starts, but Shauna smacks his arm. "Not hotter than you babe. But seriously Tobias, who do you want to take?" he asks, now getting a bit desperate to find me a date. He is going with Shauna, but they made a bet on my date. Shauna said I would never find one, and Zeke bet I could._

 _"Isn't it obvious Zeke? He's obviously smitten with that Beatrice girl he never stops writing to." Shauna says, as if it's the most obvious thing the world. This causes my head to snap up, and heat to rush to my cheeks. I would usually deny it, but I can't. Because I do have feelings for Tris. The way she speaks, always sincere and honest. How she opens up to me, and tells me how she feels. But she could never be my date to Winter Formal, because she's in Orlando, and I am in Chicago. It would never work out. I look back down and keep eating the muffin I just bought, my cheeks and neck burning. I can hear Shauna's snicker and then cackle._

 _I look up briefly to see Zeke's surmised expression, which turns to desperation. He speaks up in a firm voice. "Dude, do you actually like this Tris chick?" he asks, his voice full of disbelief. It makes me angry to hear him refer to her like that, so I snap at him without thinking._

 _"She's not just some chick. And...yeah, I suppose I do like her. A little bit." I say stubbornly._

 _"Yeah, you only like her a little bit, but when you get a letter from her you go all weird and cheerful, and you never stop talking about her." Shauna teases, and I know she's just pleased she got a rise out of me, and will be getting $20 later._

 _"Are you kidding me? Dude! I need that $20. Please, please just get a girl for Winter Formal." he begs, clinging to his money like a lifeline. I shake my head._

 _"No, Zeke. I'm sorry man, but I'm not taking some random girl who just wants to date me for no reason." I say firmly, before bidding_ _them goodbye and leaving._

* * *

That was just the beginning. I suppose you could say that Shauna just brought me out of the denial I had around my feelings for Tris. I couldn't help the way I felt about her. What with my parents divorce, my mother's pregnancy and everything else going on, she was one of my only escapes. And I couldn't help myself falling for her. It was like falling asleep, it happened slowly, and then all at once. Like I just stood on the edge of a precipice for a moment, but then jumped. But I liked the feeling.

When my mother filed for full custody for me at 16, Tris was the only person I felt comfortable venting to. I told her everything, about how my mother had cheated on my father, and how I didn't hate or blame her for it. How she endured physical abuse, as well as verbal and emotional, from my father, and tried her hardest to protect me from the hate he tried to pin on me.

She was the first person I told when my mother told me that she was pregnant. I didn't know what to do at first, so I just ran out the house. I ran for a good 4 miles, until I just walked home, my mind cleared. I wrote to Tris almost immediately, telling her how excited and nervous and scared I was, and she was so kind in response. She was supportive, and gave me tips on how to handle siblings, having one herself. It took me a week to come to terms with it, but I had to be there for my mom. So for the next 8 months, I tried my best to help her. I helped her fill in the divorce and custody papers, as well as decorate the baby's room and even managed to juggle school at the same time.

When I was just 16, my mom had the baby while I was at school. I remember Max coming into my class, and telling me to come to the office. I was then taken in a taxi to the hospital, where I was met with 4 hours of waiting, anxious waiting. When those hours were over, I was met with a doctor handing me a bundle of pink blankets, and showing me to my mom's room. She looked exhausted, but happy. And proud of me. She even let me choose her middle name. It wasn't hard.

Her first name was Melanie, but my mom told me to choose a middle name. So I chose Beatrice. I think my mom knew where it came from, the girl I'd been writing to for years, but she never brought it up. So for the next 6 years, I lived with my mom and Melanie Beatrice. I moved about 15 minutes away for my new job in DPD. Melanie was sad to see me go, she always looked up to me, so my mom said. It hurt me to leave her, she was my little sister after all, but I moved into my apartment and everything worked out.

But the Beatrice I had fallen in love with did anything but go away. It seemed every letter she wrote I fell in love with her more, but it made me feel even more guilty each time. I couldn't help but fantasize about kissing her, holding her hand, just being her boyfriend. She had no idea how mad I was when she started seeing Peter. I hated him, hated him for being such an asshole to Tris. I'm glad she saw sense after a while. But those dreams and fantasies didn't stop. It even got to the point one night where I literally dreamed I was _marrying_ her. It was so vivid, her golden hair in waves down her back as she walked up to me in a white dress. It definitely wasn't a bad dream, but it made me feel guilty anyways.

I knew she probably didn't like me back, and just thought of me as a good friend. I didn't want to ruin what we have, so I never said anything. But my mom did. She just brought it up one day, at dinner.

"You know Tobias, if you like a girl, you should just tell her you know." she said bluntly, not looking at me. I snapped my head up to her in surprise, but I knew exactly what she meant. Just tell Tris you're in love with her.

But I couldn't. Because if I did, I would risk losing our friendship, something I cherished. I pray she feels the same, but as she holds me close now, I can't tell if it is out of friendship, or our of more.


	4. Chapter 4

**Tris' POV**

* * *

The rest of the afternoon goes by in a blur. Tobias and I were almost late getting back to the office after lunch, purely because we spent ages just talking and walking slowly down the streets, just talking. A small part of me believed that he wouldn't be the same in person. That he'd taken time to write his letters so that he came off as something he wasn't, but he is exactly what he said he was. His words come to him as easily as they seemed to in the letters, our shock and nervousness now gone. He's funny and sweet, gives me a chance to talk. Needless to say it's as if we've been together for years.

We got back to the office on time, thankfully, but that's only because the sky started pouring with rain, and we had to run back to the office. We were both absolutely soaking, but it was worth it, because we fell into hysterics the moment we got into his office. I was almost crying with laughter, and it wasn't even funny. It was just the sight of him laughing so hard and the thought of us running like morons into the building, both having forgotten an umbrella or coat.

Eventually, we got control of ourselves and went back to work. Turns out this job is a lot more fun than it appeared, but I think that is because it's for Tobias. I'm meant to be picking up lunch, making coffee etc, but he insists on doing it himself. At about 4, I got up to make us both a cup of coffee, knowing exactly how he likes it - black with 2 sugars. I went over to the little coffee section they had set up, and started making 2 cups of the stuff. Halfway through, he stopped me. I didn't even hear him get up, but suddenly he was behind me, his arms crossed casually.

"Are you kidding? What are you doing?" he asks, gesturing to the coffee I'm now stirring and adding sugar to.

"I'm making you coffee, silly." I say with a light laugh. I sit the spoon back down on the table, and go to pick up the mugs. But I'm cut short when 2 strong arms pick me up and start tickling my sides relentlessly. I shriek with laughter, having always being a ticklish person. He even lifts me off the floor a little, as I'm almost crying with laughter. He's laughing too, his warm arms around me. I can just feel the muscle underneath his shirt, which doesn't surprise me at all. Dauntless Police, even those with jobs like Tobias' require physical agility, so I knew he'd be strong.

He holds me up for a little more, before sitting me down on my office chair, and bringing the coffees over, putting one on his desk and one on mine. I smile in gratitude at the kind gesture.

"I'm just making up for lost time." he says quietly, but I hear him. I smile and blush at the comment.

"Me too." I say quietly, hoping not to come off as flirty, not wanting to lose my friendship over some stupidly strong feelings. He sits at his desk, and we go back to work. It's just like this morning, but I'm much more excited than anxious now. I can't wait to have dinner with him, show him my apartment, meet his friends, have him meet mine...it's like all of my dreams come true. Well, not all of them.

 _Flashback:_

 _It was freezing outside, it being in the middle of December. I fell asleep quickly, being bundled in blankets and pillows. I was tired too, but I didn't expect to have dreams like this one. It was just a normal night of dreams, until I got to this one point where I was in a white room, surrounded by Christina, Marlene, my mom, Christina's mom, and a piles of make-up. I stood up out of the chair I was sitting in, to be met with a beautiful white dress, that I was wearing. Christina and Marlene were wearing mermaid style blue dresses, and my mom had a blue hair ribbon in to match them._

 _I looked into the full length mirror on the wall, and though the picture was blurry in my mind, I could see a beautiful wedding dress, my hair was plaited in a fishtail down one shoulder, and my make-up was clearly done by somebody else. I looked like one of the women from a wedding catalog. It was then in my dream that the doors of the room opened, and my dad came in. He took my arm, and walked us off, following the rest of the girls, up a long aisle in our local church. It was then I realized - this was my wedding._

 _I looked around, everybody was smiling at me. I kept walking on my white flats, until I reached the altar. Will and Caleb were off to the side, smiling at me. My father took my hand and put it in my husbands'. I looked up, and saw a familiar face looking down at me. Tobias. I smiled, but my heart was thundering against my dress. He smiled at me and took his hands in mine. It was then that the howl of the wind outside ripped me away from my dream, and I was faced with the harsh reality, that I was not being married to Tobias. Though at the time, I was still with Peter._

 _I felt guilty about the dream, thinking that I was being unfaithful to Peter and risking my cherished friendship with Tobias. But I would be lying if I said that I didn't enjoy the dream, which perfectly reflected upon the feelings I had been discovering I had for Tobias. I did keep the dream in mind, and the more I thought of it, the more I liked it. I never told a soul._

* * *

After work finished at 7, George Wu knocked on the door to ask how the first day had gone. I simply smiled and told him I was glad I took it. I was just about to grab my bag when George blurts out casually,

"You know that girl you always talk to Zeke about? I heard you say she was coming here, you going to meet her tonight?" he says, completely oblivious to the fact I'm the girl he is talking about, and I'm right here. I freeze for a moment, but I turn my head towards Tobias. He is beet red, and I can tell he didn't want me to know just how much he talks about me. It doesn't mean I'm not stoked to hear it though. Just knowing he thinks about me so much as to talk to his friends about me makes me feel honored.

"He talks about me?" I say casually, my bag on my shoulder. I walk over to them, standing next to Tobias. George looks between us for a moment, before he realizes what I'm saying.

"So, _you're_ the famous girl? Tobias never shuts up about you. You should hear him, every day in the break room, talking to his friend Zeke! Every day he has something to say about you, something that you wrote to him to say. Well, I'll leave you to get home. It was lovely meeting you Miss Prior." he says kindly, before leaving the room. I turn to Tobias with a smirk and my eyebrows raised.

"Well, I, uh. I _do_ talk about you, well, a lot, I'm sorry-" he says nervously, running his hand through his hair. I interrupt him before he can finish his sentence.

"Sorry for what? Tobias, I'm honored you talk about me. So, are we going for dinner, or what?" I ask eagerly, walking out the door before he can respond. He simply chuckles, and follows me out onto the busy street. He walks toward the car park, so I say goodbye to him, giving him a hug for good measure.

"Where are you going Tris?" he asks, his face riddled with confusion.

"Back to my apartment?" I say, as if it was obvious.

"No, you're coming with me to my apartment. We can order pizza, and watch a movie or something." he says with a crooked smile, before taking his hand in mine and dragging me to his car. We laugh all the way, before we unlock our hands and get into his black Volvo. He reverses out the car park, before driving off onto the street.

* * *

We're in his car for about 20 minutes, until he pulls into an underground car park. I know from the letters that he has horrendous claustrophobia, and judging from his face, even this makes him a bit unnerved. I put my hand on his, keeping it on top of it while he still holds the gear stick. It seems to relax him a bit, so I don't remove it until I have to. The building we're in is definitely on the higher end of the price scale. I knew his job is payed well, but to afford this place? He must be payed tonnes.

He retakes my hand, intertwining our fingers. It feels so strange and good to have physical contact with him, after waiting so many years. I know that this gesture, us holding hands, is just from friendship. He is probably just holding hands with me because he just wants to make up for the long distance these past years, but I can't help my heart thundering a million miles an hour as he holds my hand tightly. I immediately notice how expensive this place is when we walk through the lobby, everything made of sparkly black stones.

I notice he doesn't take the elevator, probably due to his claustrophobia. I notice the grin on his face as we climb the stairs, stopping on the 6th floor of the building.

"I didn't know you were so...loaded." I say bluntly, not knowing what else to say to the fact he has a freaking _key card_ for his room. He literally just swipes it over a little panel on the thick wooden door, and opens it. Ever the gentleman, he steps to the side and lets me go in first. I admire the apartment. It's open plan, the kitchen to my left flowing into a dining room, which is on one side of a long room that also contains a comfy looking living room. The whole place has a very modern, airy feel. The aesthetics and colors are surprisingly similar to my apartment, but much more masculine feeling.

I must have just been staring around in awe, because I hear his deep chuckle behind me. I spin around on my heel to see him smirking at the expression on my face, which I have no doubt is wide eyes and wonder.

"To answer your question, I'm not loaded. Not by a long stretch, but I am comfortable." he says casually, tossing his keys on a little wooden sideboard and kicking his shoes off onto the floor. I slide off my flats, placing them next to his. I admire the decor of the room even more as I walk through it.

"You have really good taste." I say with a smile as I admire the place.

"Thanks Tris. I just wanted you to know...I meant what I said last night. In that text, I mean. I love you Tris, you're literally my closest friend." he says, the last part more quietly. I can hear the emotional and sincerity in his voice though. It melts my heart.

"I love you too Tobias. I know that isn't something you just toss around lightly, and I-I'm grateful that you trust me." I say, staring into his deep blue eyes and admiring every aspect of his face. There is just as much emotion in my voice too.

He smiles at me, a full smile this time, not just a smirk. It melts my heart to see it. It's then that he picks up his phone and shows me the living room, where he has a pretty massive flat screen TV on the wall. He dials what I assume is the pizza place, while simultaneously opening a cabinet filled with countless movies. I cross my legs like a little kid, going through half of the movies before deciding on one. I doubt he'll understand why I picked it, but it's worth a shot.

I take the disc out the box, carefully putting it into the player before sitting on the comfortable black leather couch. He sits next to me, still on the phone to the pizza place. He takes the phone away from his ear and covers one end and says quietly,

"What flavor do you want?" he asks, smiling at me still. I can't help but smile back.

"Just pepperoni, please." I say, taking the remote and selecting the language on the movie. I hear a beep as he hangs up the phone, and then puts an arm around me. I stiffen slightly at the touch, and feel a path of flames where his arm is laying around my shoulders. He tugs on my shoulder, and I take the hint, moving along, so I am sitting much closer to him.

"What movie are we watching?" He asks, smiling expectantly at me. I know we have similar taste, so I hope he'll like what I've picked.

"The Simpsons Movie. You know...for old time's sake." I say quietly, not looking him in the eye in case he has completely forgotten.

"God, I remember that. I wanted to take you to the cinema to see that movie so bad." he says with a nostalgic tone to his voice, as if thinking back to a time that seems just minutes ago on one hand, but centuries on the other. I try not to dwell on the fact that he could be saying that with a double meaning, that he wanted to take me on a date all those years ago. But he mustn't mean it.

I click play on the movie, and it starts up. We watch it in peace, both of us having seen it multiple times before. We laugh together, make little comments about it all throughout. About 20 minutes through, we hear a knock on the door, and Tobias gets up to get the pizza. When he comes back in, he's carrying a massive box that I stare in surprise at. So much for being comfortable, he must have quite a bit of cash to afford pizza that size like it's nothing.

He sits the box down on the little coffee table, and opens it up. A massive pepperoni pizza is sitting there, and I swear my mouth waters. I reach forward to grab a slice at the same time as he does, our hands colliding as we reach for the same slice. We break out into laughter, and I can't help thinking that this is how it's meant to be. That it should've been this way all along.

The pizza is even more delicious than I thought, and I actually ended up eating a full half of it. When I finally finish my final slice, and take a gulp of my water, Tobias is flat out just staring at me with a curious expression.

"God, I don't think I've ever seen a girl eat so much and not be worrying about her weight in my entire life." he says bluntly, causing me to bark out a laugh. I know what he means, and to me it's a huge compliment. I know a lot of people, women in particular, worry compulsively about their weight and figure. I don't think I've ever worried about my weight, because I regularly go on runs, and sometimes I even go to the gym. After the whole Peter incident, I booked some self defense classes and since then, I feel so much more confident that I can defend myself.

I blush at Tobias' comment, but my selfless upbringing tries to pass off the compliment.

"Thank you. I don't see why I should worry about my weight, I go on runs and things like that, so I don't have to worry." I say like it's nothing. Tobias just smiles at me and shakes his head in disbelief.

* * *

An hour later, the film has long finished, as well as the pizza and the bowl of popcorn we ended up eating. By this point, it's half past 8, and I'm finding myself sleepy, but energized at the same time. Somehow, Tobias and I have moved even closer to each other, because my thigh is right against his and his arm his holding me close to his chest. He turns off the TV with the remote, and we start just talking, about nothing in particular. As if we've been doing this forever. It feels so natural, and perfect.

I should really get going and go home, but Tobias' grip on me is telling me otherwise. We're broken out of out little bubble by loud voices coming from the door. Whoever it is must have a key card for his apartment, because Tobias doesn't seem worried. We don't even have a chance to move from the position we're in, because an older woman is standing at the door of the living room, a little girl that is about 7 or 8 holding her hand and standing next to her. This must be his mother, Evelyn, and his sister, Melanie.

Evelyn gives us a strange, knowing smirk, before smiling fully at us. The little girl hides behind her mother for a moment, clearly confused at who I am.

"Mom. I didn't think you were calling tonight." Tobias says with a hint of embarrassment on his face and in the tone of his voice.

"I didn't know you had company tonight." she says back, clearly not expecting me to be here. I feel awkward now, knowing that I really should be going.

"Where's Kevin?" Tobias asks, Evelyn now coming over and sitting on the other sofa, Melanie still clinging to her hand, looking at me with wide eyes.

"At home. He's got a touch of the flu, so I gave him some medicine. I should've rang you, I didn't mean to interrupt." Evelyn says with a sympathetic smile. I think she's surpised that somebody other than Zeke, Uriah or Shauna is here. Tobias mentioned he usually didn't have visitors. It's then that I decide to speak up, standing up to leave.

"I'm sorry, I'm really overstaying my welcome. I'll see you at work Tobias?" I say, smiling in his direction, my coat folded over my arm. Tobias takes my elbow and pulls me back onto the sofa.

"You certainly are not overstaying your welcome. Mom, this is-" he starts, wrapping his arm around me again. Evelyn interrupts before he can introduce me.

"Beatrice Prior. I'm friends with your Mom, and I know your face from the picture Tobias has on his bedside table. It's nice to finally meet you." she says kindly, causing me to turn to Tobias.

"It's nice to meet you too, Evelyn. You didn't tell me you have a picture of me next to your bed!" I exclaim, giggling slightly.

"Yeah, it's been there for a while-" he starts, but surprisingly, Melanie catches all of us off guard by exclaiming loudly,

"You've had her picture by your bed for years! Are you Beatrice!?" she says eagerly, standing up and making her way over to me.

"Yeah, I am. You're Melanie, right?" I ask, smiling at the adorable little girl who has brown eyes, like her mother, and similar cheekbones to Tobias, but that's about it. I know from Tobias that Kevin must be her father, and that he is now married to Evelyn. Technically, Melanie is only Tobias' half-sister, but I know they are very close.

"Yeah! My middle name is Beatrice, just like your name!" she says excitedly, surprising me even more by giving me a tight hug. Being what my mother calls "maternal" I can't help but hug her back. One of the most touching things Tobias ever did was giving his little sister my name as a middle name. Needless to say I was absolutely speechless and almost cried when he told me.

"Your brother talks about you all the time. I didn't know you were so tall!" I say, smiling at her, despite the intense gaze I can see Tobias giving me from the corner of my eye.

"Hehehe! He talks about you _all the time!"_ she says with a giggle. I blush and turn to Tobias as she goes back to sit with her mother.

"What? I talk about you to everybody, you're basically famous with everybody I know." he says with a shrug. I just laugh and shake my head. I send up staying for another half an hour, just talking with them, before Melanie literally falls asleep on the couch. I take that as my cue to leave, so I take up my coat again and walk towards the door. I shrug my coat on as Evelyn comes up and hugs me, catching me off guard, as well as Melanie hugging me from the other side. I giggle as she does, until they eventually let go. When they do, Evelyn says,

"It was great to finally meet you." with a curious expression on her face. Melanie just giggles and waves as Tobias comes up to me and hugs me so tightly I can barely breathe. I hug him back just as tightly, not wanting to let go.

"I can't wait to see you again." he whispers in my ear, before kissing my cheek as close friends do, and waving with Melanie as I walk out the door, the skin where his lips touched my cheek burning. I smile to myself as I walk towards the bus station, just thinking about how this day went from average, to one of the best in my life in literally seconds. I suppose that's what happens when you meet somebody you've been longing for, for almost 2 decades.


	5. Chapter 5

**(A/N: Hey guys. I managed to find my mojo again, after not only receiving a great grade on my maths, History, English and Geography exams, and getting a bit of a confidence boost from some of my friends. I am so, so so so grateful for all the very kind and supportive messages I received. I dedicate this to you guys. This chapter is like 75% flashbacks to things that have happened between Chapter 4 and this chapter. I really hope this suffices, I don't particularly feel this is one of my best chapters, but this story is very well received. Just to let you know, something much worse than my little problems has happened recently. On Friday 16th November, somebody I knew but wasn't really friends with was hit by a car, while it sped through a red light. I send all my prayers to him and his family, as he is now in critical condition. I don't know if any of you are religious, but if you are, please say a prayer for Ben. Thank you xx** **)**

* * *

 **Tris' POV**

The few days have flown over. It feels like mere seconds ago I was jumping into Tobias' arms in the middle of his office, and meeting his family. I've hated every moment I've spent away from him, as pathetic as it sounds. I am still fighting off feelings, every night I go to bed, thoughts immediately fill my head of Tobias. Not what we did that day, not what we will do tomorrow. No, this is purely about fantasising about him. The usual, but far, far more intense. I suppose that it would've been this way if I'd known him all along in my teenage years.

The feelings I always had for him never once faded, or dimmed at all. No, they always burned bright, scorching hot at the forefront of my mind, but when I jumped into his arms that day in the office, they fire exploded into an inferno. An inferno I know that I can never possibly put out, no matter how I try.

It's already Saturday night, and I'm rushing around my small kitchen, making a quick, easy Ceasar salad. I've already made a huge pan full of my pork pasta, cleaned my entire apartment and bought a chocolate cake, but I still feel like I didn't do much. I suppose time really is flying over, despite how much I try to busy myself. Today, that busying was mostly about rushing around my apartment, making dinner. That isn't to forget the outing I had this morning to the local park.

Tobias vehemently insists on walking me home every night, despite it still being mid September and the nights being well lit by the sunlight. He says it's just in case anything happens, which I told him was sweet. I wasn't lying, but on the inside I was melting into a puddle, that urge to jump up on my tiptoes and plant a kiss on his lips arising once more. When I got to his apartment, he told me that since it was our first weekend together (A stupid idea I must have planted in his mind), we should go somewhere tomorrow and on Sunday.

I agreed, and asked him if he wanted to come to my apartment for dinner tonight, something I've been meaning to ask him all week. I know I shouldn't, because I know he wouldn't judge me on something so stupid, but I really was outdoing myself by making all this food. Better safe than sorry I suppose. So, he agreed to come to my apartment for dinner, and I agreed to meet him at the park at 10.

 _Flashback:_

 _I was really looking forward to a lie in on Saturday morning, but it didn't take much to wake me up on Saturday morning. I didn't think twice about my exhaustion, I was too eager to get out, and meet Tobias. I even took a moment to calm down, and firmly tell myself, You are just friends Tris! Stop trying to impress him, he doesn't like you like that!_

 _Once I'd given myself the little pep talk, I hurried out my apartment in one of my comfortable, light dresses. I had come to like the style of clothing a few years back, in the summer and early autumn months. The particular one I wore that morning was white, but not see through white, more cottony. I wore my little pale blue pumps to match, and put my hair in a simple ponytail. I didn't even get onto the street before Tobias stopped me. He must've been coming to pick me up, which only makes my stomach flutter even more._

 _I didn't see him for a moment, in the crowd that stands a good foot taller than me. He must've seen me, because he grabbed my hand and pulled me towards him in an alley, my confused face making him laugh quietly. His eyes looked down at my dress for a moment, but not like most guys would, like I was their last meal. Tobias looks at me like I'm a human worth respect._

 _"You look lovely," he said, smiling sweetly at me, those deep blue eyes burning into mine with intensity. I took that moment to look at how effortlessly attractive he looked himself, in a white muscle tee that stretched over him perfectly, showing off his defined build easily. He wears a dark jacket on top, and dark blue jeans with small holes in the knees. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder, holding me a little closer to my body than friends would, making my stomach do a flip almost instantly. Don't be stupid, it's because you're CLOSE friends!_

 _He lead me to a beautiful park, almost a world away from the bustling, noisy city around it. The grass was a luscious green, and was sunny in patches but mostly shaded from the huge oak trees, at least 8 of them, standing tall with huge masses of leaves. A long pavement ran down the centre of it twice, cutting the huge rectangle of grass and trees in 4. The path was lined with wooden benches, and children run and play everywhere. A little ice cream stand stood in one corner, a long line of people waiting for the cold treat._

 _I smiled. It's the kind of place my mother used to take me as a child. I even have a rather fuzzy memory of her taking me to this very park, when I was 5 years old, back when we still lived in Chicago. It feels surreal to know that the last time I was here I was a tiny child, probably not even as tall as my mother's knees, but now I'm returning, years later, a young woman with a job and an apartment. The thought leaves me looking a little dazed._

 _Four chuckles. "It's nice, right?" he asks, his arm now draped a little lower, so his hand is on my elbow. I nod, smiling up at him._

 _"Yeah, it is." I say, and a shiver goes down my spine as Four squeezes my elbow. He leads me over to a section of the bench square that is more deserted and quiet than the others. I sit next to him, still admiring the beauty and serenity of the place. Tobias sits right next to me, our feet just barely brushing each other._

 _"I've wanted to take you here for years. I knew you'd like it." he says with a smile, as if he is well pleased I like it so much._

 _"You really do know me, I love it. It's so calm and pretty..." I say, giggling at my own cheesiness._

 _"I have no idea what to say to you. What do you say to somebody you've been waiting for, for 2 decades?" he chuckles, shaking his head, yet not breaking eye contact._

 _"How 'bout we just ask each other questions, like about ourselves, see how well we know each other?" I say wish a shrug and a laugh, tucking a loose strand of hair from my ponytail back behind my ear._

 _"Sure. My favourite colour?" he offers, and I can't help but roll my eyes._

 _"You underestimate me Eaton. Black. What's my favourite movie?" I ask, giving him a smirk. He smirks right back._

 _"Romeo and Juliet. Or Lilo and Stitch. What sport do I sometimes play?" he asks, and I notice we're leaning very slightly towards each other._

 _"Ice hockey. My first crush?" I ask, laughing almost uncontrollable, just like him._

 _"Probably whatshisname from Chasing Liberty. My first crush?" he asks with a smirk that makes my knees wobble just slightly._

 _"How did you know?! Um...probably...Taylor Swift? My best friends?" I both exclaim and guess lamely._

 _"How did you know that? Tris, that's insane...and, Christina and Will. And Marlene, too." he says with an evil looking smirk, obviously relishing in the heavy blush on my cheeks. I notice how our feet are now literally twisted around each other, but I don't want to move, so I pretend I don't notice the obvious. He blushes a bit as well, but he doesn't move either._

 _"Yeah..." I breathe, but I can barely get the words out before a stupid, stupid bee flies onto my shoulder. I immediately jump, our ankles disconnecting and me making a small gasp and shriek. He merely laughs, but what neither of us realised was that the stupid thing was still on my arm, and the sharp pain in my elbow alerted me to that. I cried out in pain, gasping and making groaning sounds. I couldn't help the laugh that escaped my mouth, watching him try to hold in hid clear amusement._

 _I giggle for a moment, and he joins in, laughing at my pain, until I realise it actually does hurt quite a bit. I gasp and make strange groaning sounds, holding my arm, wincing. Tobias looks genuinely concerned, his fingers nursing my arm, making the skin feel like it's on fire. He stands up, holding his hand out. I take it, and he pulls me off the bench, leading me towards a small chemist on the corner of a street near the park. The pain dulls a little, and he must notice that from the lack of my groaning noises, but he doesn't let my hand go, even though we're right outside the Chemists._

 _It isn't the casual hand hold we had before, where our hands were just loosely connected. This time it is much tighter, our fingers interlaced and our palms touching. I wish I would stop feeling like every piece of me he touches catches on fire, because I feel like everybody must notice it, but really, I don't want this to end. He buys a wasp/bee sting cream, and we walk back to the park. Our hands are still together._

 _Tobias sits next to me on a different bench this time, nearer the ice cream stand. He opens the tube of sting cream, and gently rubs some on the red lump on my arm. The cream is cool, but I barely notice, because his finger tips are warm, and once again, my skin is tingling where he touches it._

 _"Better?" he asks, a drool worthy grin plastered across his lips, his eyes angled toward me. Suddenly my mouth feels dry, and I'm sure it's because I've been basically drooling all over him for the past few minutes. I can already feel the blush on my cheeks heating up, and going down my neck and onto my ears. I immediately become embarrassed, and pray that he doesn't notice how much I'm already falling even harder than I did before._

 _"Yeah, yeah, much better. Thank you, Tobias." I say, not shying away and avoiding eye contact like I normally would when embarrassed, no, I'm looking straight into his eyes when I say it, and his face is a curious one. For a few moments, I think I was seeing love, but then he stands up once more, and I follow him to the now shorter line for the ice cream. We stand for a few minutes in the line, just talking, until I'm suddenly distracted by a very beautiful butterfly, one of my mother's favourites. I'm too busy watching the butterfly to notice that we were at the front of the line, and it isn't until Tobias chuckles, and places a hand on my shoulder blade and guides me out of the way of the next customer._

 _I look a bit startled at first, but then he hands me a sugar cone filled with a light green colour of cold ice cream, and holds his own filled with a dark brown up, in a cheers manner. I look at him with a pleasantly surprised that he knew my favourite ice cream flavor was Pistachio. I click mine with his and laugh at the silly gesture, before taking a lick of my ice cream. It's delicious, and they know how to make it just right._

 _"Wow, that is good! We'll have to come back here soon." I say, and then I realise how silly that sounded. It almost sounded like I was suggesting a date, or was I overthinking it-_

 _"Definitely. I knew you'd like it." he says with a grin taking a lick of his own ice cream, settling my nerves. This isn't awkward at all, no, this is a long, true friendship, and I pray that it is becoming more. Maybe that look he gave me a few minutes ago was proof, but I could just be overthinking it._

Ever since Monday morning, I feel so much happier with my life. It sounds stupid, and cheesy, and I know that, but it just does. I feel more content with myself, my choice to move, my job, everything. On Tuesday Night, Tobias and I went to go meet our friends at a restaurant a few blocks from my place, called the Chasm. Needless to say we had a fantastic time, and it was great to see Will, Christina and Marlene after 2 months. I also got to meet Zeke, Shauna and Uriah, who broke into immediate laughter the moment they saw me.

 _Flashback:_

 _The moment I sit across the booth from them, next to Tobias and Christina, they start laughing hysterically and banging their fists on the table. I furrow my eyebrows, and I feel my body go a little rigid. I know I shouldn't, but I want to make a good impression on the people in Tobias' life. I really do. If they don't like me, I would feel awkward, and disconnected slightly from him. As the past 17 years have proven, I just can't have that. So, when they start laughing at my mere presence, it makes me feel a little out of place._

 _Tobias sighs. "Don't worry, they aren't laughing at you." he says, seemingly anxious for whatever it is they are laughing at. When Zeke finally stops laughing, he throws his hand across the table, his palm upwards in an expectant manner towards me. The gesture just confuses me more._

 _"You owe me $20!" he laughs, barely getting the words out. I furrow my eyebrows at him, giving him a curious look. Tobias suddenly realises whatever Zeke is getting at, and immediately looks away, trying to change the subject, but failing._

 _"What?" I ask, chuckling a little._

 _"Zeke, did you see the game last-" Tobias starts, but Zeke and Shauna just break out laughing again, shushing him. I notice Uriah is now paying them no attention, and is staring straight at Marlene, who has just walked into the restaurant, like she is an angel._

 _"You're not getting out of this one mate! OK, so when we were 16, right, I made this bet with Shauna that if Tobias got a date for the dance, she would give me 20 bucks. Obviously, Tobias did not get a date, because he is so madly in love with you right, and he still is, even though he'll deny it. So, that would explain why he looks as you like Uriah is looking at that Marlene." He explains, laughing his way through at mine and Tobias' faces. We are both blushing, and denying every claim under our breaths. But is Zeke telling the truth? Does he actually like me as more, has he this entire time? No, I'm just being stupid._

The doorbell ringing startles me a little, but I quickly calm down, scolding myself for being so nervous. This is Tobias we're talking about. Stop trying to impress him like some love struck teen! I smooth down my hair a little, and walk to the door. What am eventful week...


	6. Chapter 6

**(I just thought I'd let you know this is the final line of this spell of breaks I've had. I know this story's 6th chapter was one I had a deadline for, yet, that deadline was completely missed. It sucks, it truly does. I have let you down, even if this story isn't a big deal to anybody at all, I still let you down in some respect. I'm not going to go on a tangent about how my life sucks, because my life does not suck. It's no dream, not by a long shot, but the responses I have been getting to that author's note have reminded me that I'm not alone, and that there are people so much worse off than me. This chapter is dedicated to a guest I could not reply to specifically, but wrote a very long review that left me near tears. I have since decided how I have to prioritise my life and set goals, as well as not let other's opinions affect me. So, I have made a difficult decision.**

 **Faction High will be updated once every 4 DAYS. These deadlines will not be missed because they are far easier to hit. This story, will be updated ONCE A MONTH. That seems bad, now I've written it. This story had 60 follows. That's 60 people who value this, not to mention the 3,000 other readers. Yet, I can't write a chapter for this once a week, or multiple times a week. I'm sorry if this disappoints you. I promise these updates won't be just rubbish, like this. They will be solid, long chapters with plot and purpose. The minimum/average will be 5,000 words a chapter. I have been writing a lot lately, but most of it has been me writing my Titanic story. I am writing it before I publish it. I made a mistake with this story, but only now do I realise it.**

 **I should've waited, and written it first, but I didn't, so the once a month updates will do. This has nothing to do with me leaving the fandom, I am not leaving it. After finishing reading Allegaint, and sobbing like a baby for the last quarter, I am just as much a part of this fandom as before. Thank you for your patience xxxxxxxx)**

He smiles when I open the door, his eyes lighting up. It makes my heart flutter to hear he was excited to see me. He wears a pair of blue denim shorts, and a dark red top. I suddenly realise how effortlessly attractive he is, and how basic and plain looking I am. I step to the side in welcome, smiling up at him, hiding my nervousness. He steps in, and immediately starts sliding his shoes off. I smile at the gesture, as I did the first time he came into my apartment.

He's a very clean person, I've discovered. I suppose when you write to somebody, you can't convey your mannerisms well, and over the past week, I have learnt a lot of them. Like how when he's nervous or embarrassed about something, he rubs the back of his neck with his hand, or how when he's confused, he furrows his eyebrows. Somehow, I never knew a lot of things about him. None of them were secrets, but just interesting little things about him I have enjoyed discovering.

I think his cleanness and general tidiness were ingrained in him while he was living with his Father, because the few times I have been to his Mother's home, it is one of the messiest places I have ever seen. I found it very funny, because Evelyn was obviously flustered trying to tidy, but she and her daughter seemed to like the clutter all around them. The place was clean, but there were things everywhere, constantly being lost. Apparently, Tobias constantly has to look for things because one of them has had another spell of misplacing their things.

He uses his foot to slide his shoes onto the mat next to the door, making sure not to touch my freshly cleaned floor.

"God, whatever that is it smells great." he says honestly, smirking at me. I try to not blush while thanking him shyly. I need to stop being so coy and swoony, but it's becoming increasingly difficult. I find myself constantly wanted to hold his hand, or lean up on my tip-toes and press a kiss to his lips. He follows me in comfortable silence into my living room, where I sit next to him on my small, but comfortable couch. He looks so relaxed and at home here it brings a smile to my lips.

"It's so strange to think this is just normal now," I start, Tobias' eyes looking straight into mine as I say so, as if he's hanging on my every word, listening intently. "Like, I see you every day, I see your Mom and your sister sometimes, our friends are friends...you know?" I say, shaking my head in disbelief that this is all actually happening. I blush once again when he shifts on the couch, sitting right next to me, his arm around my shoulders, holding me to his body in an embrace that makes my heart race and cheeks burn with a pink colour.

"I like this normal, Tris. I like being here, with you." he says quietly, close to my ear. We sit there for a few minutes more, just leaning on each other. I try to stop my heart beating out of control, but it's pretty difficult, because this whole thing feels very intimate. Eventually, I fight the urge to lay there in his arms forever, and get up to go and serve dinner.

"You choose." I say, handing him the remote for my TV. I hurry into the kitchen, dishing the pasta into 2 bowls carefully, making sure to give him an extra big portion. It's only when I turn around to go back into my living room do I notice how he's leaning against the door frame of the kitchen, his arms crossed casually and a wicked smirk on his face. He laughs when I gasp, not noticing just how stealthy he is.

"You scared the crap out of me!" I shout playfully, grabbing 2 spoons out of the cutlery drawer next to the door. I stick a spoon in each bowl, handing Tobias his.

"Thanks. This looks great." he says through laughing with me over my gullibility. We walk back into the living room, both of us still smiling like idiots. He's only been here 10 minutes, but they've definitely been the best 10 minutes of my day, as stupid and cheesy as it sounds. He sits close to me once again, careful not to get any sauce on my furniture. I watch him apprehensively as he takes the first bite of it, his eyes shutting as he makes a slight moan sound, making my blush intensify. I can't imagine how I must look right now, probably awful. I'm blushing like a swoony teen, and my breathing is fast and shallow.

"God, you really can cook!" he exclaims, taking another bite of the pork pasta I spent a while on. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside to hear him say that.

"Thank you. It's nothing really, just some pork and my marinara sauce." I say casually, shrugging as I take a bite of my own pasta.

"You make your own marinara sauce?" he asks, his voice laced with disbelief. I nod. "I tried that once, it's actually really difficult. Bea, you have some serious skill." he says, making me gasp. He hasn't called me Bea in years.

"Did you just call me Bea, Tobias?" I ask through a chuckle. His free hand goes up to the back of his neck, as I have noticed it does when he's nervous or embarrassed. I never thought Tobias would be either of those things, but knowing he gets like that sometimes only makes him more human.

"Sorry, I forgot how much you hate that nickname.." he says honestly, taking yet another bite of his meal.

"It's nice to hear you call me that again, actually." I say, smiling at him. He smiles right back, his hand coming down from his neck. "You know, I can always tell when you're embarrassed because your hand goes straight to the back of your neck." I admit, smirking as he realises how right I am. He mustn't have noticed it before. I laugh as I watch him stare at me in disbelief.

"Yeah, well I can always tell when you're embarrassed because you go all red. Like you are right now." he counters playfully, making me blush even harder. I blink and don't look away, but I can't help the even heavier blush on my face. God, can I stop blushing for 2 minutes?!

"Shut up!" I exclaimed in an embarrassed and flustered voice, making him laugh quite loudly. His laugh is so contagious I couldn't help but laugh with him, but neither of us really know what we're laughing at, we just can't help it. He's actually pretty funny when he wants to be. We keep talking non-stop for the next hour, our pasta long finished. It's like we can't shut ourselves up.

"I never really wanted a dog that much, I always wanted fish. I had a goldfish, I guess, but what I really wanted was some of those bright coloured tropical fish, you know? They're easy to take care of, and they're beautiful to look at, too." I say, somehow finding ourselves on the topic of pets.

"Yeah, I know what you mean. Maybe I should get you some of those tropical fish soon, then?" he asks, smirking at me, knowing full well I'll refuse. I've been brought up with a undeniable selflessness, so I always struggle to say no to people, and if they're buying something for me, I'll say I don't need it. It was mostly a problem back in high school, especially with my relationship with Peter. I was always seen as a bit of a pushover, until I broke up with Peter. Around that time, I started holding my own a lot more, fighting my own battles. It was a big step for me in becoming the person I am today.

"No, no, you shouldn't. I'll get them for Christmas, I think. I'll probably not get much for Christmas, because I'm living on my own now. I mean, I don't want for much. I'm lucky in a lot of aspects, so I'll just buy a few things for myself." I say, trying not to seem greedy or ungrateful.

"That's such a you thing to say. You're so selfless Tris, really. It's one of the things about you that I've always aspired to be." he says, making me stop in my tracks. He aspires to be like me, of all people?

"What? You can't be serious? I don't see why you would aspire to be me, especially since I knew you all through high school. I was a hot mess back then, you know. I said a lot of things I didn't mean. I think Christina's blunt honesty rubbed off on me, and I got a few qualities that I was ashamed of...at least I dropped them when I graduated. I still don't think I'm the kind of person you would want to aspire to be, though." I say honestly, admitting to my messy high school years. I still regret them when I think back, because I was a real mess, and a bitch at times.

"Weren't we all hot messes back in high school? Tris, I still aspire to be you because you're a genuinely amazing person. You're selfless, and kind and brave, and intelligent. Don't think because you went through a rough patch in high school that you're a bad person, because you grew up and became something remarkable." he says genuinely, his eyes filled with such admiration it makes me literally jump into his arms, wrapping mine tightly around him in a close embrace. He hugs me back immediately, albeit a bit surprised.

"Thank you. You're an amazing person too, and I've always looked up to you. If I'm honest, you've always been my favourite person." I admit, which is quite difficult for me to say. It's almost like I'm admitting I'm madly in love with him, but not quite. I doubt I'll ever get to that point. This night is a great example. I wouldn't give this up for a near impossible shot at something more, I just wouldn't.

"Thanks Bea. You've always been my favourite person, too." he says honestly, pulling away. We still sit close to each other, but then a loud, shrill ringing echoes through the room, and I hop off the sofa to get the souffles out of the oven. They were surprisingly easy to make, all I needed was half a jar of nutella and 2 eggs. Tobias follows me, watching me take a very apprehensive breath as I ease the scorching white ramekins out of the oven, making sure to put them down the moment I can.

When I was about 7, I made a red velvet cake with my Mom, but when the alarm went off on the oven, she was at the bathroom, so I tried to get it myself. I didn't even think to get oven gloves, so I just picked it up with my fingertips. They burnt immediately, but I didn't want to drop the cake my Mom and me had worked so hard on, so I ran to the bench, crying in pain as soon as I got there. I still have a thick white line over all my finger tips from it, they're really awful permanent scars from the burn. Tobias notices this when I set the cakes on the cooling rack to cool down for a few minutes, because when I take off my oven gloves, they're pretty obvious.

"Jesus, Tris, how in hell did you do that?" he asks, grabbing both my hands to look at the scars, touching them gently in case it hurts. It makes my heart melt, because of course it doesn't hurt anymore, but he's still making sure I'm okay.

"It doesn't hurt anymore, I did it years ago, when I was 7. I picked up a scorching hot cake tin from the over without gloves, and I burnt all my fingertips. The scars are disgusting, aren't they?" I say, showing my vehement dislike for the marks that brand my skin.

"They're not disgusting Bea, they're part of you. At least they didn't lump up, like the scar I've got on my knee. Remember that time I told you I went biking down that rubble?" he asks, not letting my hands go. The skin tingles and it almost feels like little electric sparks are emitting from the contact. I nod at his question, remembering the time he told me that.

"Yeah, you ended up going to hospital and getting stitches. How old were you then?" I ask.

"15. I know, what 15 year old would do something so stupid, but the scar is awful." he says, lifting his left leg a little to show me the white, slightly lumpy, jagged scar on his knee cap. I gasp as I run my scarred fingers over it, laughing lightly at how we've both got awful marks from stupid things.

"It was silly, but you didn't know how dangerous it was. That's why I'm so careful with things like this, because I'm always paranoid that I'll burn my fingers again." I say, gesturing with my arm to the 2 souffles sitting cooling. I test them very gingerly with my fingers, just to find they're still nice and warm. I slide the ramekin dishes onto plates, and take out a tub of vanilla ice cream, scooping out a single scoop onto each plate. I take a 2 forks, putting one on each plate like I did the pasta, handing him his. We don't bother going into the living room again, despite the pasta dishes still sitting on my coffee table in there.

We sit at my small kitchen table, where he utterly loves the dessert. It makes me even happier to hear it. "You don't have to completely out do yourself every time I come over, you know that, right? Every time I come over, you always make something that takes ages. You could just get crappy take away and I'd be pleased, you know. I just want to spend time with you." he says kindly. My lips are parted slightly, amazed by how much he genuinely likes spending time with me.

"I know, but I like to cook. I wouldn't get you crappy take away anyways, even if I was completely broke." I say, sucking the last bit of ice cream and souffle from my spoon, before setting the silverware on the plate and picking it up, along with his. I run some hot water, and add some soap, turning around suddenly to see he's stepping right next to me with the pasta dishes, so kind and considerate it still blows me away. He starts washing the bowls, and we stand in comfortable quiet, both of us humming quietly to the music I have playing quietly in the background. When we're done, we dry the dishes and I show him where they go, and he effortlessly reaches up to the high cabinets I struggle to reach on my own without a chair.

"Than-" I start, but then he's wrapping both hands around my waist, his feel moving slowly to the music. I chuckle nervously, having absolutely no idea what he's down. "T-Tobias? What are you doing?" I say through a hysterical laugh. He starts laughing too, but he doesn't let me go, and we keep moving slowly, slow dancing all around my kitchen. It's the exact thing I dreamt of doing with a boyfriend when I was a child, before I had feelings for him. It feels so romantic and intimate, but I'm sure it's just me who's feeling it.

When the song stops, and my phone's playlist finishes, the kitchen goes silent. I suddenly realise how close our face are, just inches apart. His breath is warm on my face, smiles wiped off both of our faces. Is he going to kiss me? Holy cow, he's going to kiss me. He inches closer, closing the gap between us slowly, but then my phone rings really loudly, startling us both. He steps back, his hand going to the back of his neck like before. I curse my Mom silently when I see it was her who was ringing me, but then I feel bad about it and pick up. I mouth "sorry" to Tobias, who just shrugs and mouths back "It's fine".

"Hey, Mom." I say, my voice bored with an edge of annoyance to it.

"Hi darling. I was just calling to see how you are." she says kindly, not picking up on the sharp edge to my voice.

"I'm good." I say bluntly, the complete opposite to how I normally speak to her on the phone. Tobias starts to walk toward the living room, and I follow him, both of us sliding back onto the couch. He switches on the TV quietly, just watching the news.

"Just good? What's wrong Beatrice?" she asks, her voice now filled with concern and worry. I sigh.

"Nothing, nothing. I'm fine. Tobias is here." I say, trying to get her to hang up and get the message, but she doesn't. Instead, she yells into my ear.

"Hi Tobias!" she shouts. Tobias just laughs as I wince, her voice nearly bursting my ear drum.

"Hi, Mrs Prior." he says politely, though his voice is still amused.

"I'm sorry I interrupted, I'll let you 2 be." she says contritely, not even giving me a chance to say goodbye before hanging up. I sigh and roll my eyes.

"Sorry, she has a bad habit of doing that. Where were we?" I ask, although I know full well what we were about to do, and that that moment is long over. I'll have a few words for my Mom later.

"It's fine," he says, switching off the TV. "I should probably get going anyway. Thank you, Tris. This has probably been the best night of my year, to be honest with you." he says kindly, standing up and walking towards the door. I check the clock on my wall and see it's approaching 10. I wish this night could last forever, but I know traffic can get bad in Chicago, even at this time, so I let him slide on his black Vans with the white laces, and open the door for him.

"Thanks Tobias. I've had a great night, too. I'll see you tomorrow?" I say, weakly, my fingers crossed mentally that he says yes.

"Sure. Can you believe it's only the first week of October, yet we're meant to get some snow tomorrow?" he says, shaking his head in disbelief, just like I do.

"Really?" I ask, my voice an octave higher than usual.

"Yeah, it's really cold this year. I'll see you tomorrow then," he says, before giving me a quick hug, my heart picking up once more. he lets go of me before I blush, thank the Lord. I give him a little wave as he walks down the corridor, not quite shutting the door. I'm glad I don't, because just before he turns the corner, he turns his head and gives me a little wave himself. When he's out of sight, I close the door. I sigh, thinking about the moment we had in the kitchen, before picking up my phone and ringing my Mom, remembering how she interrupted it, and how rude I was.

"Hey Mom, sorry I was so mean before, but you kinda interrupted a moment, and..." I trail off, spilling the words out before I realise how silly they sounded.

"Really? Are you dating?" she asks excitedly, seemingly in anticipation.

"No, no. I think he was about to kiss me just before you rang. It's okay, you couldn't have known." I say, honestly, blushing at the thought of him kissing me. I find myself wishing it had happened.

"Oh, I'm really sorry! Wait till your Dad hears this, I always said you 2 would end up together, but he didn't believe me and-" she starts, getting rather excited. I've never heard her like this before.

"What? You were discussing this with Dad?!" I say loudly down the phone, clearly in shock.

"Oh, yes. I've known for years, but your father rather hates the idea of you and Tobias. Never mind, I'll leave you to it. I love you, sweetie!" she says.

"Love you too, Mom." I say, before hanging up. I switch off my phone, before changing into my pyjamas and getting ready for bed. Just before I drift off, I think of how close I was to kissing Tobias, feeling those lips against my own. The thought is enough to send me into a deep slumber.


	7. Chapter 7

**(A/N: Sorry, this is TINY. This must be so disappointing to a lot of people, because it's only 2,000 words and took well over a month to write. It's rubbish, really, and I feel terrible, but the truth is, I'm just not motivated to write this story. I have the motivation to write Faction High and the Language of Love and my one shots, but this is just a source of stress. I want to just call it off, but I know that Faction High will be coming to a close soon anyways, and the Language of Love is going to be finished soon too, so I'm going to persevere. About Faction High, it will be over in 10 chapters, at the maximum. I will 100% do a sequel of them on summer break, but I'm exceptionally proud of that story and I'm going to finish it on the same high note it started on almost 6 months ago. This will not be doing as well, but if I keep updates this long they may be up to weekly!)**

I can't stop thinking about last night. I toss and I turn in my bed, for the second night in a row after it, because that's where my mind is focused. I only saw Tobias at work yesterday, so it's Tuesday night and I still feel like I need his presence. I keep wishing she hadn't called, because who knows where I'd be if she hadn't. His lips were so close to mine, we were both leaning in...damn that phone call.

Work has been going great too, and now I've finished organising that file I've started managing Tobias' inbox too. Apparently I'm doing a really great job, because they're considering me for a higher position. I think Tobias is trying to get me a job opportunity at his level, too, which I'm incredibly thankful for, but I don't think he knows I know. I know it's just a simple personal assistant job, but in the mere fortnight I've worked there, it's become the single best place I've ever worked at, completely destroying Walmart, Ihop and Target.

My mind is almost never off Tobias Eaton, his eyes are always branded in my mind, and though I have no problems with it, I still find myself getting all smiley and positive when they come back into my mind. I feel really silly, actually, because I have never been so attracted to someone in my entire life, but it's silly because though I think it's very, very likely the feelings are requited after our near kiss in my kitchen, but because he's my best friend. This is someone I've shared everything with, and that leaves me vulnerable. What if he has second thoughts, or the moment in the kitchen was a mistake?!

I realise now that I am very vulnerable to heartbreak. If he doesn't feel anything at all for me, or hates me or looks at me differently because of how I feel, would send me into a whirlwind of pain. I normally never let myself become this open, this easy to break, but I don't want to close off, because it feels like that whole, seemingly far off idea of actually becoming his girlfriend, is getting closer and closer. It's almost within my grasp, but I can't stretch any further, Tobias needs to do that. I find myself always thinking, even just in the back of my mind, that at any one moment he might ask me if I feel that way towards him, and the thought both thrills me and terrifies me.

If we did get in a relationship, it would be so different to Peter. It would be healthy, I'm certain of that, and probably a lot easier because I wouldn't have to be constantly trying to be something I'm not for him, but I detest the idea that our natural, loving bond now, as best friends, will just not work in a relationship. That being said, as much as I love him as a friend, my feelings for him as a boyfriend or love interest are just as strong, if not stronger. That's why I've stopped being so tense around him, though I do find myself having to remember that I need to wait, wait until he makes another move.

* * *

A week after said night of tossing and turning, I lie here on my couch, cackling my head off at the stupid jokes Tobias and I keep making. We're stuffing our faces in candy and soda, laughing over nothing. It feels perfect, just happy, just happy together. I just wish one of us would just have the guts to kiss the other. Not me, but I did see him staring at my lips a little while ago. I pretended I didn't notice, but I made a mental note to wear no lipstick again. Not that I wear it much anyways, but it really makes me feel confident to know he thinks I'm pretty.

It doesn't take long for us to decide to be really stupid and build a pillow fort out of my mattress and my pillows, which ends up with both of us just lying on my bed watching Disney movies and laughing and literally anything the other does, even if it isn't even remotely funny. Not long in though, we find ourselves much closer than we were before, my head on his shoulder. It's totally innocent, and could be entirely friendly, but our eyes keep meeting and I really want to kiss him...but I don't.

I shouldn't be so cocky and assuming, but by the look in his eyes I can tell he wants to kiss me too, but neither of us do. I don't know if he thinks it, but the thought in my mind is that as great as this moment is, it isn't THE moment. It's perfect, it is, but my mind is racing and my eyes are drooping.

"You just make me so goddamn happy, you know that?" he says, totally catching me off guard. All of a sudden I don't even care that I'm tired anymore, because I'm straightening up, and laughing with disbelief.

"Tobias! That's so sweet of you!" I exclaim, hugging him tightly. This doesn't catch either of us off guard, because we hug for quite a while, just not caring. I love being in his arms, it's strong and secure and makes me feel safe. I don't ever want to leave him again. I'm totally floored by his words, they were so sincere and beautiful, even if they were totally blunt. He makes me so goddamn happy too, probably more so. Eventually, I fall asleep on his shoulder. I'm not fully asleep, but in that weird limbo where you can tell what's going on, even if it is a bit blurred. I hear him chuckle, and then feel him kiss my cheek. Suddenly I'm only half asleep, my mind focused on what he's whispering.

"You're so beautiful." he breathes, before moving all the stray pillows and blankets and foot packets and laying me down in the bed, kissing my cheek once more before pulling the blanket over me, and putting the rest away in my cupboard. I thank him silently in my head, but then fall asleep again.

When I awake the next morning, it takes me a moment to remember that kiss, how he called me beautiful, and all the things he said to me that make the butterflies in my stomach appear and that warm, stringy feeling in my chest spin out of control. I make my bed, looking out onto the beautiful skyline once again, before stopping when I see a post it stuck to the back of my converse boots, just as I'm about to slip them on with my clothes to nip out to get some coffee and a muffin. _He knows me too well._ I think to myself, as I peel the note away and read it thoroughly, taking in his loopy Ys and Gs.

 _Tris,_

 _You fell asleep last night so I tidied your room and put you to bed. Hey, I was wondering, do you want to come to dinner tonight? We said we were going to do it on the first day you got here, but then you turned out to be my PA and it kind of slipped my mind. So, if you want, I'll pick you up at 7? Dress casual, it's not really a fancy place - just pizza. The baseball game's on tonight at 8 too, so if we hurry dinner we can go, I had 2 tickets but Zeke's wife's sister went into labour and they've all rushed out to Vancouver. Just wondering. See you at work!_

 _-Tobias xxx_

I try not to overthink the kisses at the bottom, but after the words he said into my ear last night when he thought I was asleep, I see that he might not have meant them in a friendly way. Which only makes me happier. Seeing as we haven't sent a letter to each other in 2 months (Yeah, I've been here 2 months - the time has FLOWN) I decide to put it in the stash of them I have in my side cupboard. I get a little sad to think that almost 20 years worth of letters is coming to an end, but I'd toss the letters for the real Tobias in real life any day. He's the same person either way, but it's just so much nicer to have him here, right ere where we can talk and laugh and not be apart.

I end up hurrying off to get that coffee and get to work faster than I normally would, just because I'm anxious and excited to see him again. Plus, I have to take notes in a conference today, about a particularly gruesome missing person case turned murder/kidnapping that they need to organise and present to a court so they can get a long sentence for the asshole who did it to the poor woman.

When I get there, I'm just on time, thank goodness. This is my first big job, and I really want to keep the good reputation I have, as a professional. Yet, it's getting really difficult, because when I walk into the staff room/break room, and see Nita standing next to the sink next to Tobias. Nita is one of those girls who looks at a guy like a piece of meat and doesn't care whether he's taken or not. Tobias isn't taken, but is clearly really uncomfortable by how close she's leaning, and how she's running her finger up his arm.

"Sorry to interrupt, but I'm having trouble accessing a file on your drive, Tobias. Can you give me a hand?" I ask, giving him a smile that communicates so much between us. He smiles right back, and excuses himself from Nita. For a moment she catches my eye, communicating a hell of a lot too. Hers says something like "Back off" while Tobias' says something more along the lines of "I really owe you."

When we step into his office, he sighs and smiles at me.

"Thanks. She's been driving me nuts. Did you get my post it?" he asks, and I chuckle, nodding.

"Yeah, I did. I'd love to see the baseball game, and go to dinner. This isn't a date...is it? I mean, I think it is but I don't know how that really works, especially with us, I mean we're best friends and everything-" I start rambling like an idiot, making rapid hand gestures and looking everywhere but at him. He cuts me off with a laugh and a hand on my shoulder.

"I'd like it as a date. And I get it, it's new territory, but I'd like to try it, if you would." he says sincerely, looking deep into my eyes. I simply nod.

"I'd like to try it." I say, and just as I think he's going to kiss me, he pulls away. I put and give him a confused look.

"Later, I promise." he says with a wink. Yeah, it better be later. I can't wait much longer.


	8. Chapter 8

**(A/N: This is ridiculously late, like, at least a week. I am so terribly sorry, and I mean it, like life may have gotten in the way but major facepalm here, I really slipped up. Never mind, I tried my hardest to make an interesting chapter? I really don't know, at the time of writing my mind was computing three things and three things only: 1) A billion "Much Ado About Nothing" quotes for my English Exam 2) A billion science facts for my Science Exam and 3) A billion Hamilton lyrics, because of how purely amazing that show is. I apologise for that, a few of these, if you can decipher them from that word vomit, may creep up in this chapter. Anyways, on with the chapter!)**

 **Tobias' POV**

I'm not nervous when I go to pick Tris up from her apartment, not one bit, in fact, I feel totally confident. That is a complete lie. I'm not anxious or anything, I'm just really nervous. I can't even believed I managed to ask her on a date in the first place, because I'm finding it really difficult not to stare at her lips every time I'm near her, which is pretty often, because every time I talk to her she just looks so happy and energetic and beautiful, just really pretty, and I want nothing more to pull her close and press a long, deep kiss to her lips, but I don't.

She didn't seem upset or unsure when I asked her about tonight, not one bit, but that's just the way Tris is, she's good at hiding her emotions. I just hope this time the pure joy and relief on her face when I asked her to dinner and to the game tonight was real, and not her feeling bad that my feelings were unrequited. Just for a moment, I let myself think about what'd it be like if she was my girlfriend. I wouldn't have to worry about the other guys I see on the street, the ones who stare really grotesquely at her chest or ass, I'd be able to hold her hand and swing it as we do as friends, but this time I'd be able to do it to show she was mine, I was hers.

I would be able to ask her to move in with me, and I'd have the blessing of waking up next to her every morning, I'd make coffee for her and walk to work with her and write each other little post its just like we do now in the office, but I'd be able to leave hearts and silly romantic things and she'd write them back...I snap out of my fantasy when she opens the door quite abruptly, and she looks like she just took a mad dash around her apartment last minute, which she probably did.

"Hi..." I say, and for a moment I don't want to do anything but kiss her and be with her and just forget for a moment that I'm a gentleman and I can't just kiss her abruptly. She looks so heavenly, her hair is in a simple up-do, with a few honey blonde strands framing her face, complimenting her soft and beautiful features. She's not wearing a dress, and I'm so glad she isn't, because I know she detests stereotypical things, dates included. God, I sound like such a sap, knowing almost everything about her.

"Hi. Sorry, I was on Face Time with my parents, and then my curlers weren't working, so, I've just ended up like this," she says, gesturing to her dark blue jeans, brown lace-up boots and white sweater that hangs loosely on her body. She doesn't look like she's insinuating, she looks like a model, quite frankly, but maybe I'm just biased.

"You look great, Tris, really. I know this is, uh, like a date, date, but I was just going to go for pizza, and then to the baseball game if that's okay with you." I say, trying not to let my nerves get the better of me, because even though I've been on a few dates, nothing compares to this, taking my literal dream girl on a date.

"That sounds great," she says it with a smile that is impossible not to reciprocate, but her voice has a quality to it that just tells me she's been counting down the days to this for years. Her words are excited and confident, but they have an edge to them that just hints at nerves. We walk down the stairs, and out of her apartment block, but just as we exit the building I reach down a little and pull her hand to mine. She lets out a small, surprised gasp, but doesn't pull away, but instead, she threads her fingers through mine. I try to stay looking forward and casual, but I can't help turning to look at her and see the small smile on her face.

"Can I ask you something?" she questions quietly.

"Sure," I answer, nodding.

"How long, have you, uh, liked me, as more than a friend?" I wasn't expecting that. It's obvious at this point that I have a huge crush on her, no, I'm deeply in love with her, but I didn't expect her to ask me how long I've liked her. I pause for a moment but eventually answer her.

"Honestly...years," I state bluntly.

"Years?" she asks. She doesn't sound particularly disgusted or annoyed that I would like her so long, just surprised.

"Yeah. I've had this major crush on you since I was about sixteen or so...maybe sooner,"

"Huh," she murmurs pensively. "I thought it was a recent thing," Recent? She thought it was a thing that just happened recently? Yeah, because I definitely developed a complete infatuation with you recently, it isn't like I had a dream I married you when I was like nineteen or anything!

"No, I've liked you for ages," I suddenly realise just how wonderful it feels to have her hand intertwined with mine, it feels like arriving home after years away.

"I've liked you ages too," she whispers, and that's the end of that conversation. At least out loud. In my mind, the thoughts of her words are running wild. She's liked me for years too? So when we were writing letters to each other every spare minute, I was _not_ the only one who's mind was going mad thinking about how much I needed to hide my attraction to her? She was feeling the same thing? I don't know why it's so hard to comprehend, I mean, my job is to solve murders and kidnappings and things of the sort. Yet, I can't seem to understand that the very thing that I've wanted and hoped for years of my life is mine and that I actually get a chance with Tris Prior.

We walk for a few more minutes before I notice something in her demeanour change. She hunches her shoulders ever so slightly and looks dead at the ground as if she's trying to disappear, but I quickly realise what's affected her. We've walked right past a particularly crime-ridden spot of the city, and we're right in front of a wide alleyway that is clearly the venue for a hefty drug deal, there are bags being passed between shadowy figures and at least five of them are looking dead at us. Tris keeps her eyes on the floor, but I look back at the men for a moment, or maybe I'm wrong and there are women there too, but I put my arm around Tris, pulling her in and walk on, trying to show we'll mind our own business. Though, the moment we're around the corner, I'm ringing the police station. I work there, for heavens sakes.

I do, and thankfully they don't come running back after us, but Tris is still silent, even when we arrive at the pizza place, and sit down at the table. She just looks out the window for a moment, taking deep breaths.

"Tris, honey, you okay?" I ask her, not even realising that I just gave her a pet name. She jumps slightly when I reach under the table and boldly pull her hand into mine, rubbing her knuckles. Her hand tenses up, but then she looks me in the eye and relaxes, holding my hand back.

"Did you just call me honey?" she laughs, but I can tell something is still weighing on her mind. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Just...something I never told you was that when I was twelve...my brother and I walked past a drug deal just like that. I tried to keep walking, but they were already chasing after us. We ran, and thankfully we did get out okay, but we had to run across a busy road to get away. They were foolish enough to chase us across it, which just caused the witnesses to call the police, we were so hysterical. It happened years ago, but I still get scared..." she says it with guilt laced in her voice like she's sorry for doing something.

"Hey, you don't have to worry, you're safe now..." I trail off at the end, moving from my side of the booth to hers. I wrap my arm around her shoulders, still nervous that she's going to realise that she's making a huge mistake, being with me, someone with so much emotional baggage. It's entirely irrational, but then she puts her head on my shoulder and her arms around my waist and the thoughts and the doubt vanishes, disappearing immediately. I do freeze up and hesitate for the first fraction of a second when she does it because I'm so terrified that she's just going to disappear any one moment, but then I relax, because she's here right here, right now.

"Thanks," she whispers into my shoulder.

"For what?" I say, as she slowly lets me go. I have yet another urge to kiss her, as that same, brave, tough look is in her eyes. I always imagined what she'd look like in certain moods, but it's like listening to the soundtrack of a musical and imagining the choreography, you can think and imagine all you like but the reality may be something completely different. I always thought when Tris was being brave and going through things, she'd be quite placid and calm, but the look in her eyes is one of determination, and, like every other aspect of her, the reality beats the imagination.

"I don't know, supporting me and making me feel safe," she says, and then she's nervous, tucking a hair behind her ear. I smile. I never wanted anything to do with romance and love, it just seemed foreign and almost like a cage, like I would have to fake it and pretend I loved someone I didn't because I wasn't good enough, and nobody would really make me feel accepted or really happy, but Tris brings out a side of me I didn't know I had, a side that just relaxes and tenses up at the same time because I know she likes me and I don't need acceptance from her, but I want to bad to impress her it hurts.

I've always known what anxiety feels like, a horrible clenching feeling in your chest that makes your heart race, your palms sweaty and your hand go to the base of your neck to try to calm down. I knew it all through my teenage years, so I'm very familiar with the symptoms, yet when Tris is around, I feel every one. It isn't anxiety. I know that because the clenching feeling in my chest isn't one of fear and panic, but one of security and endearment. I've never felt like this in my entire life, and as much as I've despised the very idea of "forever", Beatrice Prior makes me want a dozen forevers with her.

* * *

 **Tris' POV  
** God, he's so freaking handsome. The thought makes my heart race and my breath catch because I knew I had feelings for him, I just never imagined them so strong. It's the little things, like when his ankle wraps around mine by accident, both of us drawing small, apprehensive breaths but not moving, because the warmth of his ankle on mine is such a nice feeling I don't want to move it.

I feel like time is moving too fast, like every moment is slipping away and I can do nothing but let it, and live solely in the rush that is the feeling of being so comfortably on edge, constantly. It's like sitting on the top of a rollercoaster, the anticipation at its peak, and then it drops and you get a huge rush of adrenaline, but then just as it starts to fade and you catch your breath you're right back at the top again. I haven't tired of it in the months I've known Tobias in person, and I doubt I ever will. Just when I think things are going to simmer and get boring, they don't, and I get another blast of fast heartbeats and breaths caught in my thoat. They feel like they've been gone centuries, when it's been mere seconds.

I completely crave and relish the feeling of being so...helpless.


	9. Notice

I'd like to start this by saying how grateful I am for your patience and kindness. The amount of kind, heartwarming messages and reviews I receive are so motivating to me and I cannot thank you enough. Even for just clicking on this story, you have made my day.

I know that on time updates are a thing of the past at this point. I'm almost a week late on Faction High being updated, and I'm only 400 words of the 2,000 I aim for each chapter even after that time. As much as I love how supportive you all are, this is just down to laziness and procrastination, but also, I do need to take a break.

Don't panic, it won't be for long. I will take a week-long break, and will republish Chapter 39 of Faction High next week on Monday. I'm also aware that The Letters of Fate has gone through the entirety of March without its update. That I deeply apologise for. I hate to say it, but I'm not quite as passionate about Divergent and its characters as I was in the summer/autumn/winter of 2018. I put this down to rediscovering my love for A Series of Unfortunate Events (A much smaller community/fandom), but the final season of the show was released in January and I left that fandom by the end of February.

The problem I have been facing for several years is that the moment I think I'm done with a particular fandom and can get back to my main one, Divergent, a new one pops up. This time, it has turned out to be The Umbrella Academy, which you will see by the short one shot I posted just yesterday. I am incredibly in love with this series and fully intend on buying and reading the comics. I love the cast, and as much as I hate to say it to you guys, my incredibly faithful, dedicated readers, I find it is a far more recent fandom than Divergent.

That is not to say that I do not love Divergent with everything in me, which I do, it will always hold a special place in my heart, I just need to take this week to get plans and ideas for my Divergent fanfictions in line. After which, I will resume ONCE A WEEK updates on Faction High. This is a slight extension from the previous 5 days. Letters of Fate will be updated when I can write a chapter. Don't stress one is almost complete, but I know that it will not be longer than three more chapters before the end.

In short, both of my fanfictions will be completed by Summer 2019. The Language of Love, which a surprising amount of you really liked, will not be out until it is complete, which will be a very long time I predict, but if you want it reposted in its incomplete form, I will. Thank you all for your kind patience and consideration, it goes to my heart and I cannot thank you enough for it.

~DauntlessTribute13


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